Nothing, and Yet Everything

In Mosiah Chapter 4, King Benjamin has just finished speaking to his people when they "viewed themselves in their own carnal state, even less than the dust of the earth." After they had learned about the atonement of Jesus Christ, an overwhelming feeling of worthlessness filled the people's hearts. King Benjamin responded to them by encouraging their sense of their nothingness.

Hundreds of years before this, Moses had a similar experience. In Moses 1 he says, "I know that man is nothing, which thing I never had supposed." The irony of this statement is that Moses had just been in the presence of God, who had proclaimed to him, "behold, thou art my son... I have a work for thee, Moses, my son; and thou art in the similitude of mine Only Begotten". How did Moses' thought process go from "You are my son" to "I am nothing"? How did the King Benjamin's people go from learning of the atonement of Jesus Christ to feeling as if they 

It is as if learning of the beauty of the Love of God (which is the atonement of Jesus Christ - see 1 Nephi 11) stirs in man's heart an awareness of their nothingness and insignificance in the eternal plan - or rather, that the glorious truth that "the worth of a soul is great in the sight of God" stirs that very soul to the greatest depths of humility.

There is so much beauty in opposition, in contrast, and in juxtaposition. Indeed, the gospel requires a complement of seemingly opposing truths - justice and mercy, nothingness and infinite worth, dark and light. Jacob's discourse in 2 Nephi 2 eloquently describes this necessary opposition.

For it must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things. If not so... righteousness could not be brought to pass, neither wickedness, neither holiness nor misery, neither good nor bad. Wherefore, all things must needs be a compound in one; wherefore, if it should be one body it must needs remain as dead, having no life neither death, nor corruption nor incorruption, happiness nor misery, neither sense nor insensibility.

In King Benjamin's discourse, he goes on to testify to the people that their feelings of nothingness were the key to salvation - but not just those feelings on their own. He testified that a person also needs a knowledge of the goodness of God, and also the atonement, and needs to put his trust in the Lord. Then "this is the man who receiveth salvation, through the atonement which was prepared form the foundation of the world for all mankind... and this is the means whereby salvation cometh."

What a beautiful illustration of the "compound in one" spoken of by Jacob in the Book of Mormon. We are everything to God, indeed, we are His children and the very reason for the existence of the atonement. And yet, we are less than the dust of the earth - we are so small and insignificant, which makes the magnitude of the atonement even more glorious.

Oh it is wonderful, that He would care for me enough to die for me. Oh it is wonderful, wonderful to me.

What do you think about the contrast between the humility of feeling the nothingness of man compared to the glory of the atonement, which is everything for us? Are there other places where you have experienced the "compound in one"? 

 

 

Cut to the Very Center

Today in fast and testimony meeting I was thinking about my parenting in the past several weeks. I have been in lecture mode, and I was reflecting on ways I could teach my children (specifically my teenagers) without lectures. It is one of my life goals to raise my children, especially my teens, to be self-reflective, self-motivated, and hard working. I try to lead by example, but sometime I am afraid that my lectures are obscuring my example, and they become discouraged or disinterested in growth.

Then I was thinking about how as parents we spend a lot of time helping our children with course correction, and how they may not always appreciate that at this time in their lives. I know that I probably didn't appreciate the helpful criticism of my parents when I was a teen.

But now that I am in the position of parent I actually crave helpful criticism. It would be so helpful to have people in my life speak out and point out those areas in which I can improve. In the first book of Nephi chapter 16, Nephi admits that he has been lecturing his siblings, and that "the guilty take the truth to be hard, for it cutteth them to the very center." Every day I feel the need to be cut to my very center. I am not a finished product - far from it - and I need all the cutting down I can get.

I am in a stage of life where the people who speak truth to me are typically speaking truth in general terms and to a large group of people, and not specifically directed at me. It is up to me to reflect on my own life and personality and allow words of truth to cut me "to the very center". This takes a lot of humility, and an enormous ability to rely on and hear the promptings of the Holy Spirit. Both are areas of life that I struggle with and work on every day.

Perhaps as I work to teach my children about self reflection, self motivation, and hard work, I can use examples from my own life, and allow them to consider if the truth is cutting them to the very center, causing them the discomfort of growth. Then we can learn together, and I can focus on my own personal growth more than lecturing my teenagers.

What do you use as a source of truth to help refine you and cut you to the very center? If you have teens (or if you were a teen) what strategies helped you teach (or learn) self-reflection, self-motivation and hard work?

My Cup Runneth Over

Remember the Lie of Perfection? I read an excellent post about the same principle written by Kathryn over at Daring Young Mom called Drops of Awesome. It was really beautiful. I especially loved her story about walking her son to the bus stop. You’ll have to head over to her blog to read that and more of her Drops of Awesome.

As an object lesson … I gave [each girl] each a small dropper and I put a 2-quart bowl on the table. I told them that throughout the lesson they would get the chance to put drops in the bucket for every Drop of Awesome they could think of that they’d done. I promised them that we would fill the bowl to overflowing by the end of the lesson.

With about 5 minutes to go, we had barely begun to fill the bowl and the girls were looking around at each other nervously. The promised overflow did not look likely. Were they not awesome enough?

At that point, I pulled out a large pitcher labeled ATONEMENT and poured water into the glass bowl until it was spilling out all over the table and the towel the bowl was resting on. The class went silent.

Read the whole post here.

Surrender

Letting myself be happy has turned out to be harder than I thought.

I’ve been thinking about the atonement for the past few days, after we had our Teachings for Our Times lesson on Sunday about President Uchtdorf’s message (which ironically was the General Conference Book Club talk for last week).

For some reason my testimony of the atonement and my understanding and conviction that it is the key to happiness and can help me bear pain and disappointment doesn’t seem to translate into something doable. I can’t figure out how to use the atonement to help assuage the pain.

Something I thought about on Sunday was how I healed (am healing) from the loss of my brother. For a while I didn’t heal – I was too busy to deal with the grief – but once I faced the grief head on, and allowed the atonement to work in me, I felt the healing. I still feel it every day (for that trial). The loss of my brother will always be a hole in my heart, but it is much less painful now than it was two years ago.  I feel like I was able to heal because nothing was ongoing. Once the initial shock was gone, there was not much left to do other than heal. There are always little moments when it’s harder – like when we’re taking family pictures, or on his birthday, or on the anniversary of his death, or when I watch someone else deal with the loss of a loved one. But in general, the pain is past. The trial is, for the most part, over.

This trial is different.

It may never be over. It may never end. Things may never, in this life, get better – at least not the way I want them to.

And I think accepting that is hard for me. Learning how to live with the situation how it is feels like giving up. It feels like being okay with things the way they are is failure. Accepting that I don’t have any power over this situation is like accepting defeat.

I guess I just don’t want to endure pain for the rest of my life. This is a spiritual and emotional pain, rather than a physical one – but I think the concept is the same. I can’t imagine living in chronic pain. I know there are people who do it. A good sister in my ward is in constant pain and confined to a wheelchair. There are actually two sisters in our ward in that condition. How do they stand it? How do they find happiness? It wasn’t their choice to be in that situation.

I think deep down I feel a little bit like this trial is my fault. I feel as if there is something I could have done. If only I had made this decision, or that decision, I wouldn’t be in this position.

Sometime in the past year I remember thinking to myself that Heavenly Father wanted me to be in this position. He knew before I did the pain I would be in. He knew it a long time ago, before I even saw it coming. He knew when He told me to make the decision I made that would lead me to this place. He knew this was the only way I would learn the things I needed to learn.

I read this quote from Orson F. Whitney earlier today in a General Conference talk by Elder Robert D. Hales,

No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. It ministers to our education, to the development of such qualities as patience, faith, fortitude and humility. All that we suffer and all that we endure, especially when we endure it patiently, builds up our characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls, and makes us more tender and charitable, more worthy to be called the children of God, … and it is through sorrow and suffering, toil and tribulation, that we gain the education that we come here to acquire.

I loved what Bonnie said about tanning leather on my most recent post at Real Intent:

You would think that the strongest leather comes from hides with lots of flesh left on them, nice and thick, that haven't been treated too badly. In fact, the strongest leather comes from well-scraped hides that have been acid-soaked and worked and left in the sun, then acid-soaked and worked and left in the sun, and acid-soaked and worked and left in the sun. Unworked leather cracks under pressure. Well-worked leather is soft and supple, water-proof and flexible. We don't grow strong by being left alone.

Tender. How do you tenderize something? Usually by beating it repeatedly. Ever seen a meat tenderizer? They come in different varieties, but almost always they have some kind of prongs or texturized surface. Ours is a very scary looking hammer. If you want to cook some really tender meat, you beat the meat repeatedly with the scary hammer. How do we become tender? By being beating, spiritually, emotionally, sometimes physically. By undergoing trials and adversity.

I once wrote about the three sources of trials and adversity in this life. Suffering is usually caused either by our own sins, the sins of others, or just by the natural conditions of this world. The suffering I experienced when my brother passed away was part of the natural conditions of this world. No one made him get cancer. His cancer wasn’t a result of some sin he committed. It just happened. It was tragic and painful, but it just happened. This trial is hard for me because I can’t help feeling like I am suffering it because of a sin I committed. I keep wanting to simply repent and make it better – but I can’t because it isn’t my sin to repent of.

Elder Hales said, “In this mortal life, each of us is going to experience pain in one form or another… It often comes as a result of our disobedience to the commandments of God, but it also comes to those who are doing all they can to keep their lives in line with the example of the Savior.” I have been spending all this time thinking that this kind of pain shouldn’t come to me because of the way I was living my life. I made good choices, so I shouldn’t have to experience this trial. But life doesn’t work that way. All the good choices I could ever make can’t stop others from making bad choices.

I really liked the last part of Elder Hales’ talk where he talked about how important caregivers are as we are experiencing pain. “There are times when, no matter how independent we may be, we must entrust others with our care. We must surrender ourselves to them. Our caregivers are those who assist in the healing process.”

If you know anything about me, you know that I am fiercely independent, strong willed, and incredibly head strong. In fact, earlier this year when my husband was gone on frequent business trips a member of our Relief Society presidency called me and asked if I needed anything. She commented that she wasn’t too worried about me because she could tell how independent I am, but she wanted me to know that they were there if I needed anything. I told her that she’s right, I can take care of everything, but it was nice to know they were thinking about me (and it was – it always helps me take care of myself when I know people are thinking of me).

So “surrendering” to outside help is something I would not consider doing. Last fall when I was having some emotional issues my husband made me see a therapist a few times. I would never have made the appointments on my own. A few months ago I finally broke down and talked to the bishop. It felt good to talk to him and get counsel, but I didn’t go back, thinking I could take care of it from there.

This week I am going to work on finding some caregivers. A person in chronic pain probably sees a doctor regularly. I think I should probably learn to surrender to some caregivers.

Surrendering to the ultimate Caregiver is probably going to be the hardest thing for me. Elder Hales said,

The Lord is our ultimate caregiver. We must surrender ourselves to the Lord. In doing so, we give up whatever is causing our pain and turn everything over to Him. “Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and he shall sustain thee”. “And then may God grand unto you that your burdens may be light, through the joy of his Son”. Through faith and trust in the Lord and obedience to His counsel, we make ourselves eligible to be partakers of the Atonement of Jesus Christ so that one day we may return to live with Him.

Giving up the thing that is causing me pain is going to feel like defeat. I don’t know how not to feel like it is. I don’t know how not to feel like I have somehow failed. I don’t know how to do it, and I am pretty sure that is the thing causing me the most pain.

Secret Combinations

Note: This post was originally published on May 2, 2011. I thought it would be appropriate to share again on the anniversary of the September 11 attacks on the United States by terrorist groups. My thoughts are turned to the victims - both those who survived and those who did not - and their families. It is heartbreaking that our country had to endure such tragedy, but I am hopeful that we can remember the unity that we experienced after those attacks and work at unifying our country again - especially as we come together in a few months to choose a president for this country. I hope that we will keep in mind that unity, and not be so divided by all the partisanship and the backbiting and the arguing. United we conquer, divided we fall. Let us be united in this great country.

Yesterday, the President of the United States announced that Osama bin Laden, the mastermind behind the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks on the World Trade Centers in New York, the Pentagon, and (presumably) the White House, has been killed in Pakistan.

What does this have to do with a scripture blog? Plenty.

The Book of Mormon is rampant with examples of “secret combinations.” What is a secret combination? Examples in the Book of Mormon talk about secret combinations that “plan to murder, rob, get power” (Hel. 2:8), “secret combinations murder to get kingdom” (Hel 6:15, 18-19, Ether 14:8-10), “government is destroyed by secret combinations” (3 Ne. 7:6,9), “secret combinations are had among all people” (Ether 8:20), “nations that uphold secret combinations shall be destroyed” (Ether 8:22-23), “many are slain by sword of secret combination” (Ether 13:18).

But secret combinations “had their origins long before Lehi left Jerusalem, long before the Jaredites colonized the Western Hemisphere.” (here) In Moses 5, we can read of secret combinations of Cain – the son of our first father, Adam. Secret combinations want to gain power and influence by violence and fear. If al-Qaeda is not a secret combination, I don’t know what is.

“Great civilizations of the past have fallen because of the influence of Cain’s combination. As it happened in the past, it could happen again.” When we look at the horrible political, social, and military conditions of countries in the middle east, where al-Qaeda, and other terrorist groups, run rampant, we see the truthfulness of this. Any country that gives support to these secret combinations will not be great. They will be ravaged and torn.

While most of the country, and probably the world, celebrates this recent military victory for the United States, I am reminded of the death of Kishkumen in the Book of Mormon. In Helaman 2:8, we read that the servant of Helaman (the chief judge) tricks Kishkumen into coming with him to the judgment seat, but slays Kishkumen instead, Gadianton and his little band of robbers flee into hiding so that they can’t be found. Just because our military found and killed bin Laden doesn’t mean that the rest of al-Qaeda will be easy to catch.

We can hope for the best, like what happened shortly before Christ’s death and visit to the Nephites. In 3 Nephi 5 we find out that all the members of the secret combinations were taken into prison – and my favorite part? They “did cause the word of God to be preached unto them; and as many as would repent of their sins and enter into a covenant that they would murder no more were set at liberty.” Of course, God’s law required mercy. I wonder if our countries would do this if by some miracle they were able to round up every member of al-Qaeda and other terrorist groups. Would they allow the gospel to be preached to these murderers?

Unfortunately, it didn’t really turn out so well for the Nephites. The scriptures don’t say if it was the same people who had “made covenants” and were set “at liberty,” but a few chapters later, in 3 Nephi 7, we read about the secret combinations that developed in the actual government, and the eventual collapse of the government. Why, after they were able to overthrow the secret combinations, and they were able to grant such mercy to those members of the combinations who would repent, did they fall so hard and so fast? They had prospered because of their righteousness, and “some were lifted up unto pride and boastings because of their exceedingly great riches, yea, even unto great persecutions".

In the United States, the stock market rose slightly to the news of bin Laden’s death, and oil prices dropped slightly. Some suggest that if this success is effective long-term against the terrorism groups, our economy might grow substantially. I doubt it will take long for us to fall back into wickedness. After the September 11 attacks, we were united as a country, people were more religious – they prayed more, they went to Church. And our country prospered. Then we started to talk about gay rights, we started to talk about same-sex marriage, we started buying more than we could afford, we stopped going to church, we started consuming more than we needed, and the economy dropped like a rock. And now, we have worked again together to uproot secret combinations from our world – which is really very small these days – and we will probably see our economy rise again. I wish that I could say I think we might last a little longer this time, but we probably won’t. In 3 Nephi, shortly after the government fell, Christ came to the Nephites.

I can’t make any predictions about when Christ will come again, but I can feel that it will be soon. (But remember Lehi and all those other Book of Mormon prophets who said “the time is near at hand” – 600 years or so before Christ’s birth – so when I say “soon” I don’t mean in the next few years – but I can believe within the next hundred years or so).

On our family blog, I have this scripture written (it’s kind of my personal theme for our family), and it is no more true then than it is now:

For behold,
this life is the time
for men to prepare to meet God;
Alma 34:32

GCBC Week 16: The Merciful Obtain Mercy

Sorry GCBC is so late this week. I have been sick as a dog. Not strep again, thank goodness, but enough that it’s hard to sit and do one thing.

I know you’ve all been waiting for this talk. It was probably one of the most popular talks from General Conference (it seems like President Uchtdorf is pretty good at giving talks in General Conference – his usually tend to be keepers).

In fact, Middle-aged Mormon Man wrote a great blog post about President Uchtdorf’s talk that is definitely a must read if you are going to read President Uchtdorf’s talk. It’s titlted “Uchtdorf’s Hammer”. You won’t regret reading it. In fact, you should probably read it even before you comment on GCBC this week. It’s that good, it might actually change your perspective about President Uchtdorf’s talk.

The Merciful Obtain Mercy – President Dieter F. Uchtdorf

While I really enjoyed this entire talk, the one phrase that knocked the wind out of me, so to speak, was this – “Do you gossip, even when what you say may be true?” I really liked this definition of gossip from Google, “casual or unconstrained conversation or reports about other people.” I think the big part for me is the “unconstrained” conversation.

In a book I read recently, I encountered this bit of wisdom about our speech –

The Sufis have a “wisdom saying” that our words must pass through three gates: Is it true? If it isn’t, don’t say it. If it is true, it must pass through two more gates before you speak it: Is it necessary to say? and Is it kind? If it is not necessary to say, don’t speak it. If it is necessary, find a way to say it in a kind way. Kind does not mean candy-coating the truth; it means saying what needs to be said in a way that leaves the dignity and worth of all parties in tact.

I think this “wisdom saying” of the Sufis fits perfectly with President Uchtdorf’s talk. In fact, I would say that not only our words must pass through the three gates, but also our throughts.

There is a quote that I was sure came from a General Authority (I first heard it in a Young Women’s class when I was probably 15 or 16). Upon further investigation I cannot seem to find it anywhere on LDS.org (which doesn’t mean it isn’t on there, or hasn’t been on there at some point – their search engine is definitely lacking), so I am assuming a wonderful YW advisor simply found this quote and thought it would be an appropriate addition to the lesson. It was.

Watch your thoughts, they become your words.
Watch your words, they become your actions.
Watch your actions, they become your habits.
Watch your habits, they become your character.
Watch your character, it becomes your destiny.

Now I feel like this has become a tangent, sorry about all that.

What about President Uchtdorf’s talk struck you?

Pride Cometh Before the Fall

I have officially finished the bulk of Isaiah in the Book of Mormon. That means (hopefully) the rest will be an easy(er) read. I love Isaiah, but I hate reading things that I don't fully understand without being able to do the appropriate research to understand what I am reading... Does that make sense?


I just finished reading about Lucifer being cast out of heaven.

"How art thou fallen from heaven, O Lucifer, son of the morning! ... For thou hast said in thy heart: I will ascend into heaven, I will exalt my throne above the stars of God..."

(2 Nephi 24:12-23)

I, too, have wondered how Lucifer, who knew God's plan just as well as Jesus Christ knew the plan, could fall. And the answer comes as this, "Pride."

Lucifer fell because he wanted to be greater than God. He wanted glory and honor that wasn't his to take.

This same sentiment carried over into the tempting of Adam and Eve in the garden. If Lucifer, now Satan, knew the plan of God, he had to have know that God's plan would be ruined if Adam and Eve stayed in the garden. So why did he tempt Adam and Eve to partake of the fruit, which Satan had to know was all part of the plan? Here comes his pride again. Satan must have thought that his banished spirits (the hosts of heaven who were cast out with him) would be able to obtain bodies. His pride wouldn't let him accept defeat. He still wanted a body, and thought he knew better than God.

But God said, "And I will put enmity between thee and the woman, and between thy seed and her seed". (Genesis 3:15)

Satan's biggest mistake has always been pride.

So it is that pride leads to destruction. And I have a feeling that is why our leaders have boldly warned us of pride and entreat us to be humble and submissive.

Yet thou shalt be brought down to hell, to the sides of the pit.

(2 Nephi 24:15)

What dangers do you see in pride? Do you think
Lucifer's biggest weakness was pride?

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Proving the Coming of Christ

I realized that there has been a bit of an intense or deep feeling on the blog lately, and it has been making me a little crazy. I have been thinking of something a little "lighter" to post about - but really, is there any part of the gospel that really is "lite" (yes, that was kind of a snarky comment about the "Mormonism Lite" review - if you don't know what I am talking about, go look it up. But it's not light reading, just consider yourself forewarned).

I am learning the balance between boldly declaring Christ'a gospel and not coming across as condescending. I appreciate those folks who stick around on the blog here and let me practice on them. I have a lot to learn about the gospel and I think I have just as much to learn about sharing it with people.

A few nights ago I started 2 Nephi 11 and I read the phrase "my soul delighteth" a couple of times, so I figured I should definitely write about it.


I especially loved this, "my soul delighteth in proving unto my people the truth of the coming of Christ" - perhaps that is one of the main reasons I write on this blog - because my soul delights in that same thing.

Like I said - I am trying to be bold without being overbearing (see Alma 38:12). I am really not good at that (ask my husband! And pretty much anyone who has met me "offline"... yikes. I am pretty bad). Well, we all have strengths and weaknesses, and if the Lord can really turn my weakness in this into a strength (see Ether 12:27) then perhaps some day I will indeed be bold without being overbearing.

Do you delight in proving the truth of Christ to "your people"? Do you struggle to be bold without being overbearing?


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Where Did I Come From?

I love science. Especially physics. My best friend and roommate from Brigham Young University was an astrophysics major when we were going through school, and I was studying physics for my minor, so we had a lot of physics classes together. When she got home from her mission and I was just married we attended a lecture about dark matter. The Wikipedia article starts out, “In astronomy and cosmology, dark matter is a currently unknown type of matter hypothesized to account for a large part of the total mass in the universe.” The lecture was fascinating, and the conclusion was, “We still have no clue what dark matter is.” Which is kind of fun in the math and science world, because that means there is more to learn and discover!

As a mathematician and lover of science (I wouldn’t dare call myself a scientist), and a very religious person, I find things like dark matter fascinating. It is not hard for me to reconcile my belief in science with my faith in God. When I come across something that science can’t explain (right now) it is usually a great faith builder for me – partly because I have to have faith that there is an explanation, and partly because when science can’t explain something it humbles me to remember just how little we do know about God and His creations.

Several weeks ago, a friend of mine shared this video with me. It was amazing. As I said, I am a lover of science, but also a lover of the gospel. Many of the topics discussed in this video brought a lot of light and truth to me as I pondered them in relation to things that I have learned about the gospel. I should probably stop being surprised that science makes so much sense. And especially that true science always fits in with the gospel.

I especially love when he says “Quantum mechanics would be intuitive to their toddlers. Whole symphonies would be written by their children…” Yup.

What do you think?

A Deadly Combination

I read 1 Nephi 12 tonight - this is Nephi's vision when the angel explains the meaning of the tree of life. This chapter spans the coming of Christ to the American Continent until the apostasy and death of Moroni at the end of the Book of Mormon.


When Nephi observes his seed being destroyed by the seed of his brethren, he comments, "and because of the pride of my seed, and the temptations of the devil, I beheld that the seed of my brethren did overpower the people of my seed.


I thought, "Now there's a deadly combination." Like drinking and driving or hair dryers in the bath tub, pride coupled with the temptations of Satan are a death wish. And more than just physical death.

Pride and sin create a spiritual death as well. Think of what happened to Lucifer in the pre-existence. He was so prideful that he couldn't accept God's plan for us. He wanted to do things his way, without any pain, and he wanted to take all the credit.

When we let pride enter our hearts, Satan can easily take hold of us. He knows pride so well. It is the thing that kept him from God, and he wants to use it to keep us from returning to our Father. It is a struggle for me each day to keep my heart soft and put away my pride so that I can learn from those around me.

"Pride and temptations of the devil" - how much easier is it to succumb to temptation when our hearts are filled with pride? It is much harder to resist the evil one when our hearts imitate his.

Do you find it harder to resist temptation when your heart is filled with pride? How do you keep from getting puffed up? How do you stay humble and teachable?

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He That Receiveth Light

Book of  Mormon Papers - a series of posts
containing papers I wrote for a
BYU Religion class my freshman year of college.

(Note: Re-reading this paper, I can tell this is right after my high school AP English course… on another note, wow! I had forgotten(?) that I knew so much about Nephi’s vision of the interpretation of Lehi’s dream. Also my awareness of Nephi’s humility is good stuff. I think I am a lot more arrogant and prideful than I was when I wrote this paper. Some change is not as good as others… Either way, this is some good stuff! I hope you enjoy it!)

After Lehi recounted his vision, Nephi desired to know for himself of the revelation given to his father. Nephi’s desire led to a vision of interpretation of his father’s dream. What other knowledge did Nephi receive to interpret his father’s vision, and how did the Lord know that Nephi was ready to receive that knowledge? In addition to an interpretation of Lehi’s vision, Nephi received visions of the “condescension of God.” The life, death, and resurrection of Christ, along with the visitation of Christ to the Americas, were shown to Nephi as part of the interpretation because he followed the instructions of the Spirit and of the angel and acknowledged his lack of the wisdom which he desired.

The Spirit of the Lord caused that Nephi should be “caught away” into a mountain, which is symbolic of a temple. There the Spirit asked Nephi, “What desirest thou?” When Nephi professed his belief in the words of his father and his desire to know the interpretation thereof, the Spirit rejoiced, and then commanded Nephi to “Look!” This is the beginning of a pattern that continues throughout Nephi’s vision. Nephi responded faithfully to the request of the Spirit of the Lord saying “I looked and beheld…” What Nephi beheld is important, however it is very interesting that each time the Spirit or the angel bid Nephi “Look!” he looked without hesitation, opening the opportunities for more revelation.

At first, Nephi only received the vision of the tree, yet to more fully explain the interpretation of the tree of life and the love of God, an angel showed to Nephi the birth of Christ. When asked “Knoweth thou the condescension of God?” (1 Nephi 11:16) Nephi answered truthfully responding that he did not know the meaning of all things. He was humble and teachable and willing to receive the knowledge that the Lord was ready to reveal to him. To reveal the interpretation of the iron rod, the Lord showed Nephi his ministry among men during which Christ gave his word to the world, for Christ is the Word. The large and spacious building which represented the pride of the world was shown to Nephi by revealing the crucifixion of Christ, for Christ was “judged of the world…and slain for the sins of the world.” (1 Nephi 11:32-33)

Further interpretation was given when the Lord revealed the righteousness of the Nephites for the four generations following Christ’s visit to the Americas and the subsequent fall into iniquity to illustrate the mists of darkness as the temptations of the devil. (1 Nephi 12:17) Also revealed was the interpretation of the “great and terrible gulf” which was the “word of justice of the Eternal God.”

The vision given to Nephi revealed to him the life and purpose of Jesus Christ. The plan of salvation, as illustrated by the vision of the tree of life, is centered around Christ. He is the reason there is a plan and He is the plan. Therefore, that each part of the tree of life was explained by a revelation of part of Christ’s life and ministry confirms that the vision of the tree of life is symbolic of the plan of salvation. Nephi demonstrated his readiness to the Lord to learn these sacred things by being eager to learn, by looking when bid to look. Man is taught in this day through similar ways. The Lord bids one to “Look!” and the more one obeys that command, the more revelation that will be added to him.

What insights do you have about Lehi’s dream? Have you had times in your life when the Spirit has told you to “look” and when you obeyed you were blessed with personal inspiration and revelation?

A Lion Among the Beasts

As you may know, I tried to finish the Book of Mormon before the end of 2011 and it didn’t happen, and so now I am trying to finish it by the end of the week. (as of Wednesday I have about 80 pages to go!)

My husband told me that I will probably have to do a less thorough reading to get through it in that time, but I was sure I would be able to get through it quickly while still studying and gleaning.

Then I hit 3 Nephi 20. You think 2 Nephi is hard, try reading 3 Nephi 20. I kept reading, even though I didn’t really understand what the Savior was talking about, and about a page and a half into chapter 20 I decided that I really needed to understand what was going on here.

I went back to verse 10, when the Savior starts talking about the remnant of Israel. I read it over and over again and I still couldn’t figure it out. I was a little unnerved that I couldn’t understand this passage, and so I finally prayed for Heavenly Father to open my mind and my hearts (“and their hearts were open and they did understand in their hearts the words which [Christ] prayed” – 3 Nephi 19:33).

And then I went back and read it again.

“Behold now I finish the commandment which the Father hath commanded me concerning this people, who are a remnant of the house of Israel.”

Great. I’ve got this – the Nephites are a remnant of the house of Israel, and Christ had to come to the Nephites, because that was part of God’s plan. That’s all stuff I knew from seminary.

“Ye remember that I spake unto you, and said that when the words of Isaiah should be fulfilled – behold they are written, ye have them before you, therefore search them – And verily, verily, I say unto you, that when they shall be fulfilled then is the fulfilling of the covenant which the Father hath made unto his people, O house of Israel.”

I had to stop here for a second and ask myself, “What words of Isaiah is the Savior talking about? Obviously not all of them, since there are some words that haven’t been fulfilled yet. And what covenant is He talking about?” The covenant God made with Israel was that Christ would come to them, and that He would gather His people. Also, that when Christ would come, the Mosaic law (which was part of the original covenant with Israel) would be fulfilled.

“And then shall the remnants, which shall be scattered abroad upon the face of the earth, be gathered in from the east and from the west, and from the south and from the north; and they shall be brought to the knowledge of the Lord their God, who hath redeemed them.”

The first line of this verse caught me off guard for a minute - “the remnants, which shall be scattered” – but I thought the House of Israel had already been scattered? And then I realized that he was talking about scattering the remnants of the House of Israel – the Nephites/Lamanites. We can see the “scattering” of the Nephites and Lamanites all over the American continents today.

Then the Savior must be talking about more of the words of Isaiah than just the Messianic prophecies. And the covenant He is talking about here must be the covenant to gather Israel.

Much clearer now (Note to self: praying before reading complex scripture passages is a great idea)

“And the Father hath commanded me that I should give unto you this land, for your inheritance.”

Also a well-known fact – America is the “promised land”.

“And I say unto you, that if the Gentiles do not repent after the blessing which they shall receive, after they have scattered my people –”

Here I am pretty sure the Savior is getting ready to talk about what will happen if the Gentiles don’t accept the gospel after they scatter the Nephites and the Lamanites and are given the promised land – remember, the Gentiles were given America as well to restore the gospel, because of the wickedness and eventual apostasy of the Nephites.

“Then shall ye, who are a remnant of the house of Jacob, go forth among them; and ye shall be in the midst of them who shall be many; and ye shall be among them as a lion among the beasts of the forest, and as a young lion among the flocks of sheep, who, if he goeth through both treadeth down and teareth in pieces, and none can deliver. Thy hand shall be lifted up upon thing adversaries, and all thine enemies shall be cut off.”

This is where I got stuck again. My first thought was that if the Gentiles reject the gospel, the Lord will allow the remnant of the Lamanites (the native people of the Americas) to destroy the Gentiles. *(see note at bottom of post)

(Image Source: Animal Planet)

Because I don’t like to speculate, I pulled out my old Book of Mormon seminary manual to see if there was anything in there. Nope. Just the “gathering of Israel” part. I even checked out this commentary video on BYUtv about it, but they did the same thing – talked about how important the words of Isaiah are, and about the gathering of Israel.

No one seemed to mention these verses, so I headed to Google (which I only use as a last resort when it comes to gospel study – I don’t like to find a bunch of stuff written by crazy people…)

I came across this blog, Feast Upon the Word, and discovered a series of posts discussing just this topic! The author is … very educated, it seems, and the posts are not for the faint at heart (I had to move to my desktop computer to read them, instead of my phone – it was really that intense – and I had to actually look up a few words he used online. And I consider myself pretty well educated with a decent size vocabulary).

I have a feeling that in order to really understand this part of 3 Nephi I am going to have to dedicate some time to studying Isaiah 52 and Micah 4-5, so I probably will just “skim” through these chapters and pick out what I can for now while I am trying to finish the Book of Mormon.

I am excited to study these passages in more depth, and hope to do so in the next few weeks!

*Turns out this passage is simply talking about the power of the House of Israel during the gathering of Israel to teach the gospel to the Gentiles and purify them. The Gentiles who won’t accept the gospel will be cut off from Heavenly Father.

Have you ever been absolutely stumped by a passage of scripture? Have you prayed to be able to understand the scriptures better? Where do you look for help understanding passages that stump you? Do you have thoughts on these passages in 3 Nephi?

I should have kept my mouth shut

Well, I got a new calling (two actually, but that’s another story) a few weeks before Christmas – choir director! Which wasn’t a huge surprise – what was mostly surprising was that it took them so long. That was probably because when we started attending this ward I complained (only a little!) about having had so many music callings, and I kind of just wanted to try out something else, you know?

Well, it turns out that callings are actually from Heavenly Father and we don’t get to pick, and I will probably be a choir director for the rest of my life (or in some other music calling) and I have finally realized that I don’t mind that one bit! I love music. Love it. I am passionate about music, especially music in the Church.

So, I gave a talk in Sacrament meeting several years ago when I was the choir director for a different ward (I posted an edited version of that talk here). One of the talks I read in preparation for that talk was Elder Dallin H. Oaks’ talk in November 1994 General Conference titled “Worship through Music.”

Last week I was talking with one of the counselors in the bishopric and he mentioned that the Bishop was thinking about spending some time during Ward Conference (in two weeks) talking about singing during Sacrament meeting, because he had noticed that a lot of the members of our ward don’t even pick up the hymnbook during the hymns. I mentioned that I had given that talk on the importance of music and had read that amazing talk by Elder Oaks addressing the exact topic!

That’s where I should’ve kept my mouth shut.

Because now I am giving that talk (well, another edit of it, since the other talk was actually about teaching children music) in Sacrament meeting next week.

And leading the choir in a special musical number.

Good thing I already taught today in Relief Society (oh yeah, I have three callings – but they call the RS teacher and ward organist “part time” callings…). I wonder how long until my ward gets sick of seeing me? (my husband and I gave talks in October, the same day that I gave the lesson in Relief Society. It was great).

In other news, my two year old came down from bed a little while ago with my economy Book of Mormon clutched to her chest. She loves the Book of Mormon, and she can’t even read yet! She mostly just loves carrying it around with her – but she doesn’t carry around any other book – just the Book of Mormon. In fact, she just fell asleep on the couch beside me snuggling it like a teddy bear.

All I know is seeing her hugging the Book of Mormon made my heart swell. I love my kids. Being a mother is the greatest thing I have ever done, and I love it. Absolutely love it. I try to remind myself how much I love it every day – especially when I am tempted to complain about how hard it is. It is hard! But what good things aren’t?

Forget Not – You Matter to Him

(find the talk here – Forget Me Not)
(find the talk here – You Matter to Him)

In President Dieter F. Uchtdorf’s talk, You Matter to Him, he spoke of a great paradox of man: “compared to God, we are nothing; yet we are everything to God.” To me these have always been some of the most beautiful principles of His gospel – that He knows and loves even me – one little person in a sea of faces and people and lives. And He doesn’t just know who I am, He loves me and cares for me deeply. Deeply enough that He gave His only begotten Son for me!

(image credit: wonderferret)

When I went to EFY (Especially for Youth) as a teenager just finishing high school, during one class with our session director (who just happened to be Matthew Richardson – now a member of the General Sunday School Presidency who gave a talk in October General Conference), he put a rubber glove over his head, covering everything except his mouth and blew it up. He said, “This is one kind of pride – the puffed up kind.” President Uchtdorf talked about this as one of the ways that Satan “appeal[s] to the extremes of the paradox of man.”

Then, Bro Richardson deflated the rubber glove and said, “This is the other kind of pride – the ‘I’m not worth anything’ kind of pride.” President Uchtdorf described this by saying, “[The adversary] attempts to focus our sight on our own insignificance until we begin to doubt that we have much worth. He tells us that we are too small for anyone to take notice, that we are forgotten—especially by God.”

Bro Richardson concluded by saying that neither having the rubber glove puffed up, nor having it deflated was going to be good for us. The solution was to completely remove the rubber glove from our head.

“How much larger your life would be
if your self were smaller in it.”
                                 ~G. K. Chesterton

I think that quote by G. K. Chesterton sums it up quite perfectly. President Uchtdorf said, “What matter[s]to [Heavenly Father is] that [we are] doing the best [we can], that [our] heart [is] inclined toward Him, and that [we are] willing to help those around [us].”

In President Uchtdorf’s talk from the General Relief Society Broadcast gave us a few things that if we will remember, will help us avoid having a rubber glove on our head.

When I heard the things that President Uchtdorf spoke about in his Relief Society talk, I couldn’t help but think what a timely message it was. I have been noticing a general despair among women in the Church these days (and I have by no means been exempt) and it touched me deeply that a prophet of God would know exactly what we needed to hear, and say it so perfectly.

You can read the whole talk on your own, and I highly recommend you do, so I won’t worry about quoting everything – but I will share the parts that meant the most to me.

I loved that he started by saying, “God is fully aware that you and I are not perfect.” Which I took to mean that we can stop beating ourselves up for not being perfect – because God already knows it. And then President Uchtdorf followed up with, “God is also fully aware that the people you think are perfect are not.” How often have I looked at a family and thought they were “perfect”! The irony of comparing ourselves to others is that we almost always end up playing to one or the other of the extremes President Uchtdorf spoke about in his talk about the paradox of man – we are either comparing our weaknesses to the strengths of others (thus downplaying our own worth), or we are comparing our strengths to the weaknesses of others (thus convincing ourselves that we are somehow worth more). This reminds me again of that quote from the article on refinement I posted a while ago. Talking about ourselves and talking about others are both ways to be prideful. But talking about ideas, doctrine, books, etc are the things that will inspire us to be more like the Savior.

I feel this way a lot, “Dear sisters, many of you are endlessly compassionate and patient with the weaknesses of others. Please remember also to be compassionate and patient with yourself.”

I wrote about good and foolish sacrifices a few weeks ago when I got back from a Ragnar Relay. If you haven’t read that post, I would ask that you do. It was a really significant learning experience for me. But as a disclaimer, I want to add this bit from President Uchtdorf’s talk: “Every person and situation is different, and a good sacrifice in one instance might be a foolish sacrifice in another.” Although I can’t for the life of me figure out when running a race like that would be a good sacrifice, maybe someone can help me see.

I am usually pretty good at being happy now – I am rarely waiting for my “golden ticket” – in fact, I wouldn’t even know what my “golden ticket” is! I enjoy my life in the moment so much that I have to continuously remind myself not to “temper [my] goals.” I am usually striving for the righteous desires of my heart, but I think that in my complacency and happiness with my life how it is, I sometimes slow down when I could be stepping up the pace a little. I am working hard to find that balance between enjoying what I have now, and working toward something better. My husband is usually the one waiting for his golden ticket, but I am the one who is sometimes too content with one bar of chocolate that I don’t even worry about buying more chocolate in an attempt to get a golden ticket.

“My dear sisters, the gospel of Jesus Christ is not an obligation.” When President Uchtdorf mentioned this principle, I immediately thought of people who say things like “I can’t do that, I’m Mormon.” or “I have to serve a mission, because I’m a Mormon guy.” I am working on writing down a statement that describes “why [I] committed to making [the gospel] a foundational part of [my life]” I think that if I can come up with a good “why” statement, the gospel will “[cease] to become a burden and, instead, [become] a joy and a delight.” I would love to say that it is a joy and a delight, and that it is precious and sweet – but I know that it can become more precious to me, if I will really focus on the why.

In the Mormon Messages above, go straight to 1:24 and listen to what he says about serving a mission. That is what President Uchtdorf is talking about.

“No matter how dark your days may seem, no matter how insignificant you may feel, no matter how overshadowed you think you may be, your Heavenly Father has not forgotten you. In fact, He loves you with an infinite love.”

I wish everyone could really understand that quote – God loves you with an infinite love. He knows you! He made you! Of course He would love you. But it’s harder to really internalize than it sounds. I have had a strong testimony that the Lord loves me from the time I was very young. It has been a great blessing in my life, and it is something that my heart yearns to share with every person on this earth.

Do you know that the Lord loves you? Do you sometimes fall into one of the traps of the adversary in drawing us to the extremes of the paradox of man? How are you able to find a peaceful place where you understand both doctrines? In what ways do you try to be patient with yourself? How do you recognize foolish and good sacrifices? Are you happy with your life now? Why have you made the gospel such a fundamental part of your life? Do you know that Heavenly Father loves you?

Find more insight on this talk over at
Diapers and Divinity’s General Conference Book Club

Counsel to Youth

(find the talk here)

Last night my husband and I watched the CES Devotional that President Boyd K. Packer gave. At the beginning of his talk, almost as an aside, President Packer mentioned how when he was first called as an apostle, when they would walk back to the Church office building from their weekly temple meeting, President Packer would hang back and walk with Elder LeGrand Richards. The other members of the Twelve would say to President Packer, “It’s so nice of you to stay back and help Brother Richards.” President Packer said they didn’t know why he did it. He then talked about how Elder Richards could still remember President Wilford Woodruff (the fourth president of the Church) – he had last heard President Woodruff speak when he was twelve years old. President Packer walked with Elder Richards so that he could learn from him. When my husband and I were looking for houses, I told him that I would rather live in an older neighborhood with established families, rather than the young military community near us. I told him the reason was that I would rather live around families who had already successfully raised children (and grandchildren in some cases) rather than families in the same situation as us – young, freshly married, small children – because I didn’t want to be around people making the same parenting mistakes I was going to be making. I wanted to be around people who could show me how to be a better parent.

I think in general as a society we don’t value the wisdom and experience of those who are older than us. We think that we can just learn it all, from books, TV, the internet, college. Last night my husband and I were talking about how it must have been when we were in Heaven talking with Heavenly Father about how this life was going to be. I’m sure He showed us what was going to happen, and we saw spirits with bodies and thought, “That is awesome! I want to do that!” but of course, we had never actually done that, so we didn’t know exactly what it was going to be like (which is part of why we are here). We can’t fully understand something we have never experienced. You can’t really know what it is like to loose a child unless you have lost one. You can’t really know what it is like to commune with God unless you have communed with Him. You can’t really know how to raise children until you have actually raised children.

President Packer read this poem as part of his talk at General Conference:

The old crow is getting slow.
The young crow is not.
Of what the young crow does not know
The old crow knows a lot.

At knowing things the old crow
Is still the young crow’s master.
What does the slow old crow not know?
—How to go faster.

The young crow flies above, below,
And rings around the slow old crow.
What does the fast young crow not know?
—Where to go.

That’s why it is so important to surround yourself with people who have experienced more than you have. Because they can help you learn the way to fly – even though you may be able to fly faster than them, it doesn’t do you any good if you don’t know where to fly.

(Image credit: expertinfantry)

One thing that specifically stood out to me from President Packer’s talk was when he said, “you young people are being raised in enemy territory.” I heard this as, “You parents are raising your children in enemy territory.” That sounds pretty frightening, to say the least. But I know that if I listen to the prophets, and to Heavenly Father, I will be able to successfully raise my children in this world.

I really appreciated President Packer sharing with the youth (and all of us) how he gained his testimony, and how at first he relied on the testimony of his seminary teachers. I also thought it was interesting that President Packer had not received a Patriarchal Blessing before he had enlisted in the Air Force (he had to have been at least 18 years old at that point). That made me wonder a little what his upbringing was like – it was probably just normal like any other child, rather than particularly extraordinary. But thought correct use of his agency, look where he is now! Look at how valuable he has been to furthering God’s work. I am grateful that he was willing to share such personal tidbits about his youth with our youth. I will have to remember to share this talk with my children when they are a little older.

President Packer also talked a bit about agency and the importance of and proper use of our bodies. I have been studying Elder David A Bednar’s CES Devotional talk titled Things as they Really Are in which he talks about our bodies. It has really been an enlightening experience for me, and I feel like I am coming to understand the importance of our physical bodies a little better.

What stood out to you from President Packer’s talk? How do you learn from those who are older and more experienced than you? Do you look for opportunities to learn from them as President Packer did?

Find more insight on this talk over at
Diapers and Divinity’s General Conference Book Club

Refined Speech

Thought I would share this quote from one of my favorite Ensign articles about refinement. By Douglas L. Callister of the Seventy titled Our Refined Heavenly Home.

Follow the Prophet

Note: I originally wrote this post on October 18, 2010 on my family blog. I have been thinking about it a lot lately, and have decided to publish it on My Soul Delighteth. I think it belongs here.

On Sunday, October 3, 2010, President Boyd K. Packer, whom members of the church sustain to be a “prophet, seer and revelator” gave this talk.

As a prophet, President Packer’s responsibility is to call the world to repentance – much like Noah did in his day as he built the ark, like Lehi in Jerusalem, and like many other prophets in the past.

Unfortunately, as they did with Noah and Lehi, the world has rejected the words of the prophets, and have even gone so far as to petition him to withdraw his statements. This is not a new thing. It has happened again and again throughout history, and God’s word has always remained unchanged. As President Packer so bluntly put it:

...there are those today who not only tolerate but advocate voting to change laws that would legalize immorality, as if a vote would somehow alter the designs of God’s laws and nature...There are both moral and physical laws “irrevocably decreed in heaven before the foundations of this world” that cannot be changed...To legalize that which is basically wrong or evil will not prevent the pain and penalties that will follow as surely as night follows day.

I respect everyone’s right to an opinion. But I also believe in God’s word, and I firmly believe in God’s prophets who deliver His word to us – especially in these latter days.

Satan is stirring up the hearts of men. A war is waging. “Who’s on the Lord’s side, who? Now is the time to show...” This particular battle hits really close to home for me. I have had to make some really difficult decisions about some people who are very dear to me. All I can think about is how to “love one another” while still being devoted to righteousness, and not “look upon sin with the least degree of allowance.” This article, a Q&A with Elder Oaks and a member of the 70, has been particularly helpful.

In response to the petition I mentioned earlier, the brethren had this to say:

Much of this was not new, but there were a lot of really great things said. A few of my favorites:

“As a church, our doctrinal position is clear: any sexual activity outside of marriage is wrong, and we define marriage as between a man and a woman.”
“None of us is limited by our feelings or inclinations. Ultimately, we are free to act for ourselves.”
“The Church distinguishes between feelings or inclinations on the one hand and behavior on the other. It’s not a sin to have feelings, only in yielding to temptation.”

I don’t believe that there is a different "type" of person that is homosexual or “gay” - to me, that would be like saying people with black skin are somehow "different" than people with whiter skin (if you've read The Help you might see where I am going with that). I know that people will disagree, and that is fine. I believe that people have same-gender, or homosexual, attractions, and that they can sometimes be very strong. But they are still just children of God to me. If they choose to participate in homosexual behaviors, or live a homosexual lifestyle, then that is what they are doing. I believe that there is nothing fundamentally different between someone who struggles with same-gender attraction, and the rest of God’s children who struggle with something else. We are all children of God experiencing trials and struggles on this earth with Satan tempting us and trying us. We inhabit imperfect bodies with imperfect emotions and chemical make ups. We all face trials. (read more about that here)

God made man and woman. He created them specifically different – to fulfill different purposes. From The Family: A Proclamation to the World, “Gender is an essential characteristic of individual premortal, mortal, and eternal identity and purpose.”

As I write this, I realize that I am not writing it to an audience of people who don’t believe in Christ and the atonement. I am writing it in hopes that someone who feels unsure about the word of God on this issue can maybe read my testimony and perhaps feel the spirit and have a little better understanding of God’s word.

It is not easy to stay true to the Savior. Especially in today’s social and political climate. There is so much of the Adversary’s influence in our societies that we can be easily confused by the arguments out there.

Sometimes I get very discouraged because the world is getting more and more wicked – good is called evil, and evil is called good. But I know that there is hope and happiness available to those who live the gospel – for those who earnestly call on God in the name of His Son, our Savior Jesus Christ and ask for a confirmation of that which is true. The Spirit will guide us. I know that because I beg the Lord for His Spirit to be with me as I raise my children and feel like I don’t know anything. And he grants His spirit to me.

If there is one thing I know is absolutely true, it is that God lives and loves us and has given us living prophets on the earth to help guide us when we become confused about how to live in the world and not be of the world.

And I hope and pray that you will try to get that testimony for yourself.

Recommended reading:
Cleansing the Inner Vessel by President Boyd K. Packer
The Q&A with Elder Oaks and Elder Wickman
The Response to the HRC Petition
Many of These Articles
This Proclamation
Another Good Article by Elder Oaks

Their Mother

One of my favorite articles of all time is titled Washing, Weeding, and Worshipping. It is more or less a tribute to a mother who “wove gospel teachings into everyday activities.”

As I re-read this article a few months ago (the first time I read it it was before I had children of my own – I think it was even before I was married or even engaged) I thought “This is how I want my children to think of me when they are older.” And that got me thinking about the kinds of things I want my children to say about me when they are grown. I decided that I would write down a “tribute” to myself written from the eyes of my grown children. I know that sounds a little self-absorbed, but I think of it as writing down a goal of what I want to be. If I can imagine what my children will say about me when they are grown, I will have something to live up to – expectations to live up to.

This past General Conference, as Sister Barbara Thompson spoke about cleaving to covenants, I was gently reminded by the Spirit about this idea to write down what I want my grown children to say about me.

And so here I write what I want my children to say about me when they are grown. This is not a description how I see myself right now – but it is how I would like to be…

Mother
what I want my children to say about me when they are grown

All through my life there have been a few things I know for sure. One of those things is that my mother loves me, and another is that she has a testimony of our Savior, Jesus Christ.

When I would make a mistake, or go down a wrong path, my mother would gently show me the way to go, and hold my hand until I got back on the right path. She taught me how to repent, and she taught me that repentance is not scary, but the joyful way we come back to the Lord when we have made a mistake. I watched her repent. When she would make a mistake, she would admit it, and I could tell that her heart would break a little. But then I would watch her pray to Heavenly Father and I could see her trying to do better afterwards, and the joy you could see on her face was indescribable. She had a way of teaching by example.

She taught me to be a missionary, and to share my testimony. She was always posting videos from the Church on her social networking pages, and always blogging about the gospel and the scriptures. She was fearless in declaring her beliefs, but was respectful of the beliefs of others at the same time. She studied the gospel every day and memorized scriptures. She would always be quoting some scripture or other that applied to our life circumstances at the moment. She truly sought first to obtain the word.

She also had a song for every occasion. More often than not, those songs came from the hymns or from the Children’s Songbook. She was always singing. We loved to sit with her around the piano and sing the hymns. She never pressured us to live the gospel – only invited us. And she made it look like so much fun that we couldn’t help accepting her invitation!

She adored our father. She was always doing nice things for him, and always had something nice to say about him to her friends. She never spoke negatively about father, and as far as we could tell, never though negatively about him either. He was her first priority. Our interjections of “Mamãe!” we frequently met with “I’m talking to your father right now, you’ll have to wait.” She enjoyed being with him and would drop whatever she was doing to greet him when he came in the room, or to listen to what he had to say.

She made life fun. She always had something for us to do, and it was always something fun – even if it was a “chore” – she made it fun for us. She always praised us for a job well done, even if we hadn’t done the job perfectly. She rarely criticized our actions, and was rarely disappointed in us. Whenever we fell short of her expectations for us, she would simply spend more time teaching us, walking beside us, and caring for us as we tried to live the gospel as she taught us.

She taught us how to love others. We learned from her that everyone is a child of God. She wouldn’t let us speak ill of any person, and she herself never spoke ill of anyone. She always found a positive light for every person, every situation, and every action. She taught us not to judge people for their actions, because we can never completely know their heart. She taught us how to serve and take care of those in need. Our home was open to anyone who needed a warm bed, a hearty meal, or simply a family to love them. My mother especially loved children. Any child was as precious as us to her, and she would do anything in her power to help every child have the opportunity to succeed.

She taught us to obey the commandments. Especially the law of the Sabbath and the law of the tithe. But instead of seeing commandments as a chore, mother made them seem exciting to live. We loved finding new ways to worship the Lord each Sunday, and mother let us help choose ways to worship.

Mother taught us to “seek ... out of the best books wisdom.” She always made sure we had books, and would read to us consistently. We loved to gather around mother as she would read to us from the scriptures and from other good books. When we left home, we each had our own collection of good books to take with us. Mother made sure of it.

Mother taught us to be like the Savior because she was like the Savior.

What kinds of things do you want your children to say about you when they are grown? Will they know the Savior better because they saw Him in you? Will they “not doubt their mothers knew” the gospel was true?

Sweet Testimony

“… inasmuch as parents have children in Zion… that teach them not to understand the doctrine of repentance, faith in Christ the Son of the living God, and of baptism and the gift of the Holy Ghost by the laying on of the hands, when eight years old, the sin be upon the heads of the parents.”
                                                                Doctrine & Covenants 68:25

The first Sunday of each month is what members of the Church call “Fast Sunday”. It is a day that we all fast (abstain from eating or drinking for twenty-four hours) and during our worship services, rather than have sermons or talks, we have the opportunity to share our testimonies with each other, when moved upon by the Spirit. We then donate the money that we would have used to feed our family to the Church to feed the hungry, clothe the naked, and shelter the homeless.

In September, Fast Sunday was the first Sunday we had in our new ward. We had been attending a Portuguese ward, but in September we started attending our neighborhood, English speaking ward.

We were sitting with our friend who is living with us and her two boys who are eight and seven. They wanted to bear their testimonies, so Russ (my husband) went up with them. Then our four-year-old wanted to bear his testimony. Usually a four year old needs a little help with his testimony, but V? Nope. He went right on up there, didn’t even want my help, and proceeded to say things like “I know Jesus loves me and love all the people.” (all the people = everyone… our son says the funniest things) – I had him tell me what he was going to say before he went up there, just to make sure he wasn’t going to be a goof ball at the pulpit. I completely underestimated him.

Don’t think my kid just spontaneously bears his testimony. We had practiced bearing our testimonies at family home evening one week. That particular family home evening we “practiced” going to Church. We set up the chairs in the living room, made a pulpit out of one of our bar stools and some cardboard, put the hymn numbers up on the wall, had our scriptures and crayons and we even made a pretend sacrament table out of the piano bench. We sang the songs in order, had opening prayers, had announcements, had “ward business” and then had a testimony meeting. We didn’t actually bless and pass the sacrament – instead when it got to the sacrament portion of the meeting we simply talked about the importance of the priesthood and the sacrament ordinance, what it means, what we should be thinking about, and we practiced being reverent. The kids did surprisingly well, and it was all in all a great family home evening that I think we will duplicate many times over the course of our children’s growing-up years.

We talk about the gospel doctrines daily in our home. They are a part of our every day conversation. This openness about the gospel is what helps our children learn about the doctrines of the gospel, and since we simply let it be part of our lives instead of something we “teach” our children about formally, I think that our children are developing a love for the scriptures and for the gospel.

Our four year old has his own testimony and isn’t afraid to share it. What an example to me!

How do you teach your children the gospel? How do you teach your children to share their testimonies? Do you encourage your children to talk about the gospel? Do they encourage you? Is gospel conversation an every day part of your home?

Woman at the Well

This weekend has been one of spiritual nourishment for me.

There comes a point after each General Conference where I find myself eagerly awaiting the next conference. The past few weeks have been like that for me. I have read, studied, pondered, and acted on the April General Conference talks, and I was just itching to receive more light and knowledge.

That which is of God is light; and he that receiveth light, and continueth in God, receiveth more light; and that light groweth brighter and brighter until the perfect day.
                                                  Doctrine & Covenants 50:24

I really loved what Elder Jeffrey R. Holland said in April about General Conference, “If we teach by the Spirit and you listen by the Spirit, some one of us will touch on your circumstance, sending a personal prophetic epistle just to you.”

I received so many personal prophet epistles I hardly know where to begin! When I was a youth, an inspired instructor told us “When the Spirit moves you, write down what you are going to do!” And it was when I took Teachings of the Living Prophets at Brigham Young University that my instructor taught us to look for instruction at General Conference. That semester she had us write down at least ten things that we were going to do because of what we heard in General Conference, and I have kind of kept up that habit. When I am writing notes during any talk or lesson, I write down the things I am going to do with a little arrow in front of them like this –> Then I can find them easily when I go through my notebook.

How do you record what you got out of General Conference? Do you listen for your own “personal prophetic epistle[s]”?