The Most Important Thing

Note: It is so easy to get wrapped up in criticism and philosophizing about lifestyles and choices and culture and doctrine and ... well, you get the point. 

While I would consider myself a covenant keeper, and I believe there is power in keeping covenants, I find myself occasionally miffed by the cacaphony of discourse that exists in the world. Recently my mantra has become “Why can’t we be friends” (complete with background music and a little side to side swaying with a snap). I truly believe the Beatles’ proclamation that “All you need is love.” Now, of course, we need to define what we mean by “love”, but in general I am using the “agape” version of love, which I interpret to mean “A profound regard for the welfare of another without any desire to control the other, to be thanked by the other, or to enjoy the process.” (Edward Nason West)

About a year ago I gave this talk about loving your neighbor, and in that talk I made the assertion that there is no commandment greater than the commandment to love your neighbor. Now, that isn’t actually my assertion - it comes from the Bible.

In the New Testament, Mark recorded an exchange between the Savior and the scribes. The scribes asked the Savior “What is the first commandment of them all?”

Jesus responded, of course, that the first great commandment is to “love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength”. What he said next, though, is very interesting. He went on to say, “And the second is like” - this means that the second commandment is like the first one - “thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself”. It is significant hat the Savior would teach us that loving our neighbor is similar to loving God. Later the Savior would teach, “Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of these least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me” and in the Book of Mormon, King Benjamin taught that “When ye are in the service of your fellow being ye are only in the service of your God.” Loving our neighbor is like loving God because anything that we do to our brethren is like we have done it to the Savior, who is one with God.

But the Savior’s next statement recorded in Mark is what really stands out to me: There is none other commandment greater than these.

Let me repeat that:  There is none other commandment greater than these.

The commandments we are talking about here are, first, “Love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength”. The second one is “Love thy neighbor as thyself.”

There is none other commandment greater than these.

But what about the law of chastity? You might ask. No other commandment is greater than the one that says to love God and love your neighbor.

How about the law of tithing? Nope. Not more important.

Surely commandments the prophets give us to share the gospel are important. But not greater than the commandment to love your neighbor.

What about the word of wisdom? Nope.

The law of sacrifice?

There is no other commandment greater than to love your neighbor.

In Matthew another statement is recorded, “On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets” and in his epistle to the Romans, Paul explained, “and if there be any other commandment, it is briefly comprehended in this saying, namely, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself… therefore love is the fulfilling of the law.” All of the other commandments are contained in this commandment to love thy neighbor. The words of the prophets can be held up against this standard. There is no other greater commandment than to love God, and to love thy neighbor.

Paul emphasized the importance of this great commandment when he wrote to the Corinthians, “And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.” If people cannot feel Christlike love emanating from us, then all our good works are for nothing. We must truly posses charity, the pure love of Christ. We cannot simply say that we love our neighbors, we must actually love them purely, without guile.

The importance of loving your neighbor is illustrated by this quote from Elder S. Mark Palmer of the Seventy. He said, “As we learn to see others as the Lord sees them rather than with our own eyes, our love for them will grow and so will our desire to help them. We will see potential within others they likely do not see in themselves… And we will never give up, remembering that those who are hardest to love need love the most.” Charity, or the pure love of Christ, changes the way we see people. When you truly love your neighbor you spend less time judging and more time on your knees asking for inspiration to serve. You spend less time wondering what people think about you and more time getting to know your neighbors and learning their needs.

What does it mean to love your neighbor? When Jesus was asked this question, he responded with the parable of the Good Samaritan. A man was traveling from Jerusalem to Jericho. The Savior doesn’t explicitly tell us that the traveling man was Jewish, but since he was traveling from Jerusalem it is pretty certain. A bit of historical context that can help us better understand this parable is that the Jews and the Samaritans were something of political and religious enemies. The most illustrative modern example would be the relationship between Palestinians and Israeli nation in the middle east. In the parable, as this Jewish man was traveling to Jericho he was attacked, beaten, and left for dead on the road.

Two Jewish men traveling along the same road passed by the wounded traveler. Both the priest and the Levite were not just ordinary people traveling, they were men ordained to priesthood offices. The person who finally stopped to help was actually the man’s enemy, a Samaritan, and not someone of his own faith. Not a fellow Jew, not a friend, but a Samaritan.

After describing the parable to his listeners, the Savior asked the question back to them, “Which now of these three, thinkest thou, was neighbour unto him that fell among the thieves?” The answer came, “He that shewed mercy on him.”

Loving our neighbor means having mercy on those around us - whether they be our friends or our enemies, whether they be part of our circle of friends who are similar to us or people who are living contrary to our own beliefs and practices. President Dieter F. Uchtdorf recently taught, “let us serve and love our fellowmen. Let us do this with a natural confidence, with humility, never looking down on any other religion or group of people.”

It can be easy to look down on those who live or believe differently than we do. We must resist the temptation to treat others with less compassion or less affection because we disagree with them. President Uchtdorf also taught, “In God’s kingdom, greatness and leadership means seeing others as they truly are - as God sees them - and then reaching out and ministering to them… The Savior loves all of God’s children regardless of their socioeconomic circumstance, race, religion, language, political orientation, nationality, or any other grouping. And so should we!” When we put people into groups or categories we create distinctions that make it hard to practice the second great commandment of loving our neighbor. Political parties, sexual orientations, gender identity, working vs stay at home, socioeconomic status, all of these groupings can cause use to pull away from our neighbors, rather than leaning in and loving our neighbors. If we are to follow the Lord’s great commandment there can be nothing that stands in our way of loving our neighbor - not political leanings, not gender, not race, not lifestyle choices - nothing. It can be incredibly difficult to look past these differences, but oh how we must learn to do this! We cannot keep the commandment to love our neighbor when we allow our differences to divide us.

There is a primary song that always seems to burn in my heart when I hear the words, “I know you, and you know me. We are as different as the sun and the sea. I know you you, and you know me, and that’s the way it is supposed to me. I help you, and you help me, we learn from problems and we’re starting to see. I help you, and you help me, and that’s the way it is supposed to be. I love you, and you love me. We reach together for the best we can be. I love you, and you love me, and that’s the way it is supposed to be.” Our differences should be a reason to love each other, rather than a reason to divide us.

In General Conference, Elder Jeffrey R. Holland gave us a list of people who should be included as our neighbors, reminding us that in the gospel family “there is room for those who speak different languages, celebrate diverse cultures, and live in a host of locations. There is room for the single, for the married, for large families, and for the childless. There is room for those who once had questions regarding their faith and room for those who still do. There is room for those with differing sexual attractions.”

Sometimes it can be tempting to want to show other people why we are right and correct them in their behaviors and lifestyle. We have experienced the joys of living the gospel and we know that if only they would change the way they believe or live or if only they would make different choices they would be happy. Unfortunately, we often let these types of attitudes change our relationships with those around us, and we look down on them, condemn them, treat them in condescending ways, block them, ignore them, or continually criticize them. We have to remember that, as Paul taught, “Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away.” Your spiritual gifts, your inspiration and revelation are of no use without charity. All the gospel knowledge in the world won’t help those you wish to help unless you first have charity.

Elder S. Mark Palmer of the seventy told a story in April General Conference about some missionaries he presided over who were struggling with living the mission rules. Elder Palmer knew the happiness these Elders would experience if they would learn to live the mission rules, but as Elder Palmer sought inspiration about changing the hearts of these young men he realized that what he really needed to do was love these young missionaries. He said,

“In that moment, I knew it was not just the hearts of some of our missionaries that needed changing. It was my heart as well. The question no longer was ‘How does a frustrated mission president get a struggling missionary to behave better?’ Instead, the question was ‘How can I be filled with Christlike love so a missionary can feel the love of God through me and desire to change?’”

I have experienced for myself the contrast between these two approaches. As a parent I have observed that my children are much quicker to change their hearts and their actions when I focus on loving them rather than correcting them. When I criticize and point out their mistakes and actions we are left with hurt feelings and resentment. When I instead make a concerted effort to more effectively show my love - whether through a hug, a smile, a compliment, a thank you, a special trip, or kind words - I noticed that we all behave a little more charitably toward each other. Unfortunately I have done more of the criticizing and less of the loving, but I am renewing my commitment to show more love toward the people who matter the most to me. This principle applies to spouses as well.

The Doctrine and Covenants contains my favorite explanation of when correcting is in line with God’s commandments. Section 121 reads, “No power or influence can or ought to be maintained by virtue of the priesthood, only by persuasion, by long-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned;” Love unfeigned means love that is genuine and sincere. You can’t fake charity. Charity is so deep in your heart, so pure, that you feel as if your heart will explode. The section continues, “By kindness, and pure knowledge, which shall greatly enlarge the soul without hypocrisy, and without guile - reproving betimes with sharpness, when moved upon by the Holy Ghost;” This last part is important - “when moved upon by the Holy Ghost”. As a mother I cannot remember a time when my reproving with sharpness was “moved upon by the Holy Ghost”. More often than not my reproving comes when I am moved upon by frustration, and the Holy Ghost doesn’t work through frustration. Remember, that it was not in the earthquake or the tempest, but in a still small voice. The majority of the time, our power and influence is more potent when we use persuasion, long-suffering, gentleness, meekness, and love unfeigned. We are more effective examples of the Savior when we follow his second greatest commandment - to love our neighbor. But wait, there’s more! The instruction in Doctrine and Covenants continues, “and then showing forth afterwards an increase of love toward him whom thou hast reproved”. If we do reprove because we were moved upon by the Holy Ghost (which let’s be honest, rarely happens, right? Because persuasion, long-suffering, gentleness, meekness and love unfeigned usually do the trick) we must increase our love toward the person we have reproved.  Increase (that means there was some love there to begin with). But remember - first we try persuasion, long-suffering, gentleness, meekness and love unfeigned.

Within the church there are ample opportunities to love our neighbors. I encourage you to jump at the chance to serve as often as you can. Remember that the Savior can empower you and give you strength to serve in ways you may think are not possible for you right now.

Visiting and home teaching is a built in way for us to learn love our neighbors - both for those visiting, and those being visited. Some people are excited for this opportunity to love and serve, while others may feel uncomfortable with the thought of, as I once heard it described, “forcing [your] way into people’s lives.” I think this is a valid concern that many of us might feel when first assigned to visiting teaching. As a recipient of the service of visiting teachers I can tell you that I have loved my visiting teachers “forcing” their way into my life. Even if I have not become lifelong friends with these sisters, I have loved their compassion, example, and experiences. Visiting teaching can help us engage with people we may not have ever been interested in getting to know, and we can learn so much from someone who is different from us. In our April General Conference, Elder Robert D. Hales taught, “Like the Good Samaritan, we cross the road to minister to whoever is in need, even if they are not within the circle of our friends.” Often, visiting and home teaching help us to reach out to those who are not “within the circle of our friends”, and we both profit from the relationship.

I had the opportunity to visit teach a sister in my previous ward who was unlike me in a many ways. Our personalities were different, our backgrounds were different, and she was much older than me. One month in the fall last year she and I were incredibly busy and we couldn’t seem to find a time to visit that matched up with both of our schedules. Eventually in our discussion about why we were so busy she mentioned that a charity she had organized was hosting a 5K and silent auction that month. I enjoy running races and so I signed up for the race and ran with a few of my kids and my husband and I was able to visit with her at the race. Although she and I were very different, this was a way that we could connect, and a way I could show her my love for her. We weren’t sitting on her couch, and it seemed unconventional for a visiting teaching appointment, but this experience helped me to understand that visiting teaching isn’t just about a monthly visit where we sit on the couch and chat. It was about getting to know a sister and finding common ground and connecting - truly loving my neighbor.

Perhaps, though, the greatest opportunities come by loving our neighbors outside of the church. After all, the Jewish man and the Good Samaritan had differences that were both religious and political.

Most of us might say to ourselves, “Well, certainly if I see someone beat up and bleeding on the side of the road I would stop and help!” But what if it was someone being verbally beat up on social media because of their lifestyle choices, which may be different than yours? What if it is someone being excluded from a game or gathering because of their political differences?

How do you treat people who are different from you in your day-to-day interactions, not just in the emergency situations? Do you speak with kindness or do you spread hateful speech on social media? How do you respond when people post points of view that are different from your own? How would you treat your child if they told you that they didn’t believe in the church anymore? What if your child told you they had a different sexual orientation or gender identity? What would you say to them to show them that you love them? In these situations are you focused on keeping the greatest commandments, or are you focused on presenting a sermon full of all the other commandments? There is a place for all of the other commandments - and as faithful covenant keepers we should definitely be obeying them. However, if we are being faithful to the second greatest commandment, to love our neighbor, then perhaps our actions and attitudes toward our fellow man would be different.

A hymn typically sung to prepare for the sacrament describes a humble plea, “Fill our hearts with sweet forgiving; Teach us tolerance and love.” Whenever I sing this hymn these words are heartfelt. I need my heart filled with forgiveness, which is so so sweet to me. I am still learning tolerance and love and I beg for them to be granted to me. Forgiveness, tolerance, and love are not part of the natural man. We must learn them and be granted them through the Savior’s atoning sacrifice. These are attributes that we obtain as we put off the natural man and become as children.

Children are naturally kind and compassionate. They don’t see differences as something to divide us, but rather as simply something that makes people interesting to them. When my parents moved to the south from Canada as a young family, my oldest brother who was about four years old met his first African American. His first reaction was to ask if the little boy’s skin was made of chocolate. One little girl saw an older gentleman in a grocery store and loudly told her mother than she liked old people because their skin was soft like hers. Children certainly notice similarities and differences between people around them, but they are more curious about those differences than judgemental. They do not look down on people who are different than them, and they don’t treat people poorly because of the differences. They are simply interested in the differences because they love so purely and want to know about the people they see around them.

Elder Dale G. Renlund spoke of the kind of behavior that can come when forget the great commandment to love our neighbor, “Persecution comes in many forms: ridicule, harassment, bullying, exclusion and isolation, or hatred toward another. We must guard against bigotry that raises its ugly voice toward those who hold different opinion. Bigotry manifests itself, in part, in unwillingness to grant equal freedom of expression. Everyone… has the right to express his or her opinions in the public square. But no one has a license to be hateful toward others as those opinions are expressed.” Persecution and bigotry are the antithesis to loving your neighbor. Where there is ridicule, harassment, bullying, exclusion and isolation, there cannot be love. When we truly love our neighbor there will be no room for these degrading behaviors. President Uchtdorf likewise testified, “Christ’s perfect love overcomes temptation to harm, coerce, bully, or oppress… Christ’s love will help us become a little kinder, more forgiving, more caring, and more dedicated to His work.” Loving our neighbor and developing charity prevents more than just unkind words and actions. Peter explained, “And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity preventeth a multitude of sins”. No only will we be kinder and more forgiving, but we can also stay pure from a multitude of other sins by practicing charity and focusing on the greatest commandments to love God and our neighbors. Paul expressed it this way, “Love worketh no ill to his neighbor”

Let us remember that, while there are many laws in the restored gospel - and making a personal commitment to obey them is wise - there is none other commandment greater than the commandments to love God, and love our neighbor. We must not let our commitment to the other laws and ordinances of the gospel cause us to neglect the highest commandments of them all - to love God, and love our neighbor. I encourage you to find ways to increase your love for your neighbors - the neighbors in your home, the neighbors in your ward, and the neighbors all around you. I know that as you develop pure Christlike love for your neighbors you will have an increased power to resist temptation, and those around you will be able to feel Heavenly Father’s love for them through you.

Wake Up! Don't You Know What We Have?

"Sometimes we sleepwalk on the path of discipleship." 

- Pres. Uchtdorf 

Saturday AM Session General Conference October 2016

One of those repetitive lessons that we hear over and over again is the plan of salvation. It seems like such a simple thing, such a plain truth, that it is easy to take for granted. In his Saturday morning address, President Uchtdorf explained that when people would ask about the Church he would usually start with something about the word of wisdom, or draw parallels between our beliefs and the beliefs of other religions. However, he mentioned, explaining the plan of salvation to people had the biggest impact. He said:

Some of my friends would say that this message felt familiar, even though such things were never taught in their religious upbringing. It was as if they had always known these things to be true, as if I was simply casting light on something that was always and deeply rooted in their hearts.

A few weeks ago, I came across this video - some missionaries in the Billings Montana mission rapping about the first lesson the missionaries usually teach - the lesson about the restoration and the plan of salvation. I enjoy rap in general (clean rap, which is hard to find!) but this song resonated with me in a way no other song outside of the hymnbook has ever been able to do.

I believe it is because the content is so powerful. The plan of salvation is such a powerful truth. I love President Uchtdorf's description of the plan of salvation in his talk. If you haven't read it I highly encourage you to read it. I may print it out and make a goal to read it at least once a week, even though it is so familiar to me. President Uchtdorf cautioned, "It seems to be human nature: as we become more familiar with something, even something miraculous and awe-inspiring, we lose our sense of awe and treat it as commonplace." I don't want to treat the glorious doctrine of restoration and the atonement and the gospel plan as commonplace! I want to adore it and appreciate it.

President Uchtdorf's sleepwalking comment hit me between the eyes. Do I sleepwalk on the path of discipleship? I think I have been sleeping walking for a while, and I want to wake up! Well, this is me waking up! What am I going to do to show that I am not sleepwalking? I am going to share the glorious message of the plan of salvation and the love of our Father in Heaven for us! I encourage you to do the same. Share the plan any time you can with whoever you can.

"What shall we give in return for the flood of light and truth God has poured out upon us?" (Pres. Uchtdorf)

An Eventful Year - Revelation and the Lord's Timing

I don't usually post "Year in Review" type blog posts. However, I was reading my New Years' post from 2012 in which I wrote that 2011 and been "the best of times and the worst of times". Perhaps that statement could sum up life in general, because 2013 definitely fits that same description.

I'm sure you have all been missing me, dear readers. And I just want to warn you that this is not me "coming back" really. I hope to be back eventually, and I imagine the summers will be better, but life has thrown me a few curve balls.

In 2013, I had five major life events: birth of a child, starting school, divorce, new job, and remarriage.

Birth of a Child

There are so many thoughts and feeling that are rushing around inside of me about the birth of my second son. His birth was amazing and spiritual and perfect and wonderful and everything I wanted it to be.Heather, from Women in the Scriptures, was my doula - and she was an amazing doula. She will deny it up and down, but I regard Heather as a spiritual giant. I feel like the labor and delivery went so well because she was there, with her faith and her knowledge and her testimony, I could just feel the power of God around me and with me. And if not from Heather, then from what she has taught me about the priesthood and womanhood and motherhood through the past several years, both on her blog and in personal conversations. She is an amazing woman.

Starting School

I felt inspired this year that I should go back to school to finish the few courses I need to qualify for a teaching license. Although I have a bachelor's degree in Math, I don't have a teaching license, and I had been feeling something nagging at me to get my license and teach. Because I was married to a soldier I didn't know how much time I would have in any one place, so I figured that I needed my education to be as portable as possible. So in May I applied to an online university to finish my teacher prep courses. Because of the next major life event, I am so grateful that I listened to the prompting to go back to school and prepare to be a teacher.

Getting a Divorce

This is probably the longest story, and I am not going to tell it all right here, right now (but you can read my emotions about a lot of it in my previous posts about my faith crumbling through adversity and trials). Suffice it to say that when I was scared to death (literally) of leaving my marriage, when I thought it would be better to be dead that divorced, when I argued with Heavenly Father, wondering why He would ask me to do something I knew was against His plan, when my faith seemed to be threadbare, something happened. I got strength from a place I had forgotten about, and somehow, I got out.

And there I was, hurting, broken, but feeling like I had burst out of a dark prison.

I felt like my life had crumbled around me, but God gave me a vision of what my new life could be if I would just cling to Him. And that is what I have been doing.

Starting a New Job

Due to the previous major life event, I needed to get a job so I could provide for my family. I submitted applications for a job on Monday in between filling out divorce papers. I filed for divorce on Tuesday, interviewed for a job on Friday, and was offered the job on Tuesday of the next week. A full time job teaching math at a middle school in a nice neighborhood about 10 minutes from my house. My good friend was looking for a job and is a fantastic mother and I asked and she offered to be our day care practically at the same moment. It was meant to be.

However, my first paycheck wasn't going to come until late September. Because I had started school I had just received some student loan funds. Between the student loans and my amazing ward I was able to make it to September with money to spare. Heavenly Father is watching out for me.

Getting Remarried
This story is probably longer than the divorce story, but I am pretty sure it can be summed up in two principles: receiving and understanding personal revelation (which I wrote about here) and the Lord's timing is not always our timing - which the Stake President mentioned in that blessing.

Did you know that "in due time" doesn't necessarily mean "in a loooong time"? That's what I thought when the Stake President promised me that I would experience the joy of marriage again and followed that promise up with "in due time" which he repeated! I was thinking "so, I'll get married again in a really really really long time. Imagine my surprise when I met my new husband and three days later Heavenly Father informed me that he would be my new husband. Come to find out "in due time" means "at the appropriate time" - which apparently is 3 months after a divorce (for me). Who knew? It didn't take my husband long to receive the same revelation, so then the only question was "when"? We prayed about it and I felt inspired that we should pick a date and take it to Heavenly Father for approval. We looked at my calendar (being a teacher I don't get a lot of time off work) and picked a date mid-January. After a few days I had a nagging feeling that it wasn't soon enough. So we thought "After Christmas would be great". Nope, wrong again. Finally we picked the day before Thanksgiving (which at this point was about a month away). Yep. It felt right. We talked to my bishop, we talked to my parents, we talked to his parents, we told our kids (six of them altogether!), and it happened! So yeah, it all boils down to receiving and understanding revelation and the Lord's timing is not always our timing.

So now you know where I have been for the last 6-12 months. Going through a painful divorce, starting school and a job, and getting remarried to a wonderful man who loves God with all of his heart, might, mind and strength, with me as a close second.

I hope to be able to write more often, but don't hold your breath. Of course, now that I have "come out" and you all know my little secrets, it will be easier for me to write. I always like being open and "real" on my blog, and I feel like I have been lying the past year or so because my marriage was so awful. So, comment on here and tell me you're still reading and I will try to post more often. If no one cares that I was gone I will probably just post whenever it happens (which might not be very often!).

What lessons did you learn last year?

GCBC Week 5: "The Savior Wants to Forgive"

I am grateful that the Savior wants to forgive. I am also grateful for the knowledge we have of a merciful, forgiving God. Isn't that a much better thought than someone who wants to make us pay for every sin we have committed? Isn't is a beautiful thought that a man loved us so much that He gave himself as an offering for our sins? He offered himself to satisfy the demands of justice, allowing God to be merciful and forgive us.

Can we even imagine the love He must feel for us?

What were your thoughts about Elder Cardon's talk?

The Savior Wants to Forgive - Elder Craig A. Cardon

If you are new to General Conference Book Club, click here to find out more. The basic idea is to study one General Conference talk each week between April conference and October conference, and to chat about the talk here in the comment section. You can also link up (using the linky tool below) to your own blog post about this talk. The link up will be open until I post the next week's talk, but if you study this talk later and missed the link up, feel free to post your link in the comment section.

A Little, Young and Tender Branches

As promised – more on Zenos’ Allegory of the olive tree. I wrote last week about a little connection I made between the house of Israel and the lifespan of an olive tree. I promised myself that I would use that connection to make my study of the allegory more meaningful this go around.

My first step was to look up the pertinent chapters to the allegory in the Book of Mormon Gospel Doctrine manual, the Institute manual, the seminary manual on the allegory, and then any talks/Ensign articles/etc. Most of them had one thing in common – they started with the part where the master of the vineyard starts grafting in the branches of the wild olive tree.

But I had noticed that the master of the vineyard did not resort to grafting at the very beginning. In fact, in verse 4-6 we discover that the master “pruned it, and digged about it, and nourished it” – and as a result, “after many days it began to put forth somewhat a little, young and tender branches.”

The only place I found a reference to these verses was a fun little graphic in the Institute manual.

So what was the pruning, digging about, and nourishing that the Lord did? And who were the “somewhat a little, young and tender branches” that began to grow? Well, I went back to the timeline of the Old Testament (the seminary bookmark) and checked out what went on before the house of Israel was scattered.

We know that after the time of Moses, the House of Israel started going downhill fast (this was about 900 years or so after the beginning of the House of Israel – or the birth of Jacob). In fact, even Moses had to deal with a lot of issues due to the House of Israel’s hard headedness. From the time of Moses until the scattering of Israel (when Lehi went to America and the rest of the Jews were carried off by the Babylonians) was about 600 years.

Image Credit: Bruce Okkema

The Lord pruned, dug, and nourished the dying house of Israel for nearly 600 years. During that time, several “young and tender” branches came forward. The Old Testament bookmark lists several of those “young and tender” branches – Joshua, Gideon, Samuel, Deborah, Ruth, Solomon, David, Saul, Elijah, Elisha, Jonah, Amos, Lehi, Isaiah, Jeremiah.

The description of the branches being “young and tender” makes me think of something delicate and easily damaged. Some of these “young and tender branches” were easily damaged. The good kings that were raised up in this time – many from their youth (young and tender branches) – Solomon, David, Saul – they were delicate, and those “young and tender branches” ended up dying off. They didn’t make it.

But there were other branches that, though young, became stronger and were able to be grafted into other tress. For example, Joshua was born in Egypt before the Exodus and was basically raised under Moses and became his successor. Then there is Samuel, who was called by God while he was still a child. We also have Elisha, Isaiah, and Jeremiah, who were raised in mostly righteous environments – young and tender branches that grew strong and stayed strong. , who was adopted into the house of , became a very strong branch – in fact, through her branch would eventually come the Savior of the world. And finally Lehi, who was spiritually young, although physically he was old became one of the strongest of the new young and tender branches, through his sons, Nephi, Jacob, and Joseph.

However, even when all of these “young and tender branches” were growing, “the main top thereof began to perish.” During this whole time the the Lord was furiously taking care of the house of Israel, trying to save it, the house of Israel was becoming apostate, regardless of the new branches that were growing.

It was at this time that the master of the vineyard finally decided to cut his losses, burn the dying branches, and begin the process of grafting his young and tender branches into other wild olive trees, hoping to create more tame olive trees that would bring him good fruit.

Image Credit: khraishi.sameer

The gospel doctrine manual points out that “For a wild olive tree to become tame and productive, its main stem must be cut back completely, and a branch from a tame olive tree must be grafted into the stem of the wild one.” The master’s plan was to tame the wild olive trees with the young and tender branches from his beloved, ancient olive tree.

It might seem odd that the master would graft wild branches into the roots of the tame olive tree, but he didn’t want to lose the roots of the old tree. The gospel doctrine manual also points out that “the root of the [olive] tree may go on producing new trees and fruit for thousands of years” through grafting the new shoots that can potentially grow from the roots of the old, dying tree into other wild olive trees (this is probably where the young and tender branches came from originally). Because the master of the vineyard took all the young and tender branches and grafted them into the wild trees around the vineyard, he put some of the wild branches into the old tree to help preserve the roots, probably hoping that the roots would keep sending out new young and tender branches.

This post would not be complete if we didn’t have a little discussion about what this all means. The most significant part of the beginning of the allegory of the olive tree, and a theme that is constant throughout the allegory (and throughout our lives) is the love of Jesus Christ for His people. He experiences grief when His people are lost. “It grieveth me that I should lose this tree” – that sounds like a loving Savior to me. He always does all He can to save us, to protect us, and take care of us. We still have our agency, and as seen by this first part of the allegory, despite everything the Lord is willing to do for us, He cannot save us against our will. But He will definitely do everything in His power to help us.

I also can’t help thinking about the young and tender branches in my own life. I want my children to grow to be strong branches of our family tree, and so I need to treat my family tree the way the Savior treated the olive tree, by pruning and digging and nourishing. Ruth is one of my favorite examples of a strong branch – she was a convert, but her branch became so strong it was through her lineage that the Savior was born. That’s the kind of strength I want in the branches of my family tree.

What doctrinal principles do you see in the allegory of the olive tree?

Love Her Mother

(find the talk here)

I have no idea why I felt inspired to write about this now,  but I think it has something to do with my husband learning how to love me, and our relationship growing and becoming stronger in the past few months.

Early last year, my husband and I got to a place in our marriage that could have been a breaking point. Thankfully, my husband picked up all the broken pieces and really did his best to fix everything. My husband is not your average guy. He is really amazing. Wonderful, really. He has a really hard past. He suffered things as a child that no child should ever have to experience. And the lack of help he received as a child to heal from those experiences has left severe spiritual and emotional scars (scars I didn’t see when we first got married, and scars that he didn’t even know were there). He is starting to heal, and it is a beautiful, but very hard, thing.

We have been married for six years, and those six years have been so hard. Of course marriage is a growing experience, and it isn’t always easy, but I never expected to have to deal with all of this hurt and pain. The thing is, I had a great, “normal”, very safe childhood. My father was a counselor and my mother was an elementary school teacher. Sure they had their faults and weaknesses – but they were, for the most part, normal faults and weaknesses, things that most parents struggle with. In general, my parents were kind, supportive, gentle, wise, and really taught us “the way [we] should go.” I have never really known many people with the kind of hurt and pain my husband has been holding inside for over 20 years. Those were the people who went to see my dad for counseling – people who had suffered hard things and needed help healing. Not me.

And yet, here I am. My husband and I see a marriage counselor just about every week. We have been seeing him since around September of last year, and I really think that he has been able to help my husband heal. There is still a lot of healing ahead (I hope). We’re nowhere near the end, but we are going to get there.

I am learning a lot about how to help my husband, and how to be strong when he is hurting.

And, thanks to the atonement of the Savior, the amazing man in my husband is able to come out from behind the scars and pain. I am learning to have more faith in the Lord’s ability to heal us. My husband has always been a righteous man, and always a very spiritual man. But the hurt from his past had caused such bitter feelings that they were eating away at our marriage. At first, I thought there was something wrong with me. It was really easy to feel that way. I felt like maybe he didn’t really love me.

How foolish! My husband loves me with all of his heart, and always has.

And I guess that is why I am writing about this after studying Sister Elaine S. Dalton’s talk. Because last October when she gave this talk, I didn’t think that my husband loved me, and so I worried about how I was going to raise a righteous daughter in a home where her father didn’t love her mother.

I look back now and realize how wrong I was. He has always loved me.

Sister Dalton said, “Love her mother so much that your marriage is celestial. A temple marriage for time and all eternity is worthy of your greatest efforts and highest priority.”

My husband and I have learned that seeing a marriage counselor is not as embarrassing as it seemed at first. In fact, we love talking to people about what we learned from our marriage counselor. He is an excellent counselor. Our marriage is top priority. And right now, it needs some help. We are putting forth our greatest efforts to protect our marriage and strengthen it.

For Christmas after our daughter was born, I bought my husband this book – Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters by Meg Meeker. I read a little bit of it, and skimmed the rest, but my husband read it cover to cover. She talks about a lot of the principles mentioned by Sister Dalton in her talk. I recommend this book to any father of a daughter.

My favorite thing that Sister Dalton suggested fathers do with their daughters was attend the temple with them. I think that is a fabulous idea! My favorite temple trips were the ones when my father came with us and baptized us.

Here are some other things Sister Dalton suggested fathers can do for their daughters:

You are your daughter’s guardian in more than the legal sense. Be present in your daughter’s life. Let her know your standards, your expectations,your hopes and dreams for her success and happiness. Interview her, get to know her friends and, when the time comes, her boyfriends. Help her understand the importance of education. Help her understand that the principle of modesty is a protection. Help her choose music and media that invite the Spirit and are consistent with her divine identity. Be an active part of her life. And if in her teenage years she should not come home from a date on time, go get her.

I really enjoyed this talk. I apologize for not writing more about the talk, but I really felt inspired to share what has been going on in our marriage. Maybe to let you know that my life isn’t perfect, and we have struggles that are really, really hard – just like everyone else.

We have to rely on the atonement of our Savior for strength, for repentance, and for healing.

What did you get from Sister Dalton’s talk?

Find more insight on this talk (and others) over at
Diapers and Divinity’s General Conference Book Club

Redemption and Repentance

(find the talks here – Redemption – and here – The Divine Gift of Repentance)

“The choice to repent is a choice
to burn bridges in every direction
[having determined] to follow forever only one way,
the one path that leads to eternal life.”

-Professor Noel Reynolds

I have a strong testimony of the principle of repentance and the gift of the atonement. I am not sure when I gained that testimony – I am sure it came gradually over the years as I grew up. I am also sure that the strength of that testimony is helped by the strength of my testimony that God loves all of His children. When you know that God loves His children, it is easy to understand that He would give them a way to get back to live with Him. A loving God would not shun us at the first hint of sin.

As strong as my testimony of repentance has been, I think that my understanding as been somewhat superficial. This quote from Elder D. Todd Christofferson struck me, “Attempts to create a list of specific steps of repentance may be helpful to some, but it may also lead to a mechanical,check-off-the-boxes approach with no real feeling or change.” I want to be sure that I am not approaching repentance with “no real feeling or change.” I want to change. That is the glory of repentance.

I can remember when the first spark of real understanding of the atonement happened for me. When I was a young woman, a young man in our ward bore his testimony one Fast Sunday about the atonement. He talked about how it is the atonement that allows us to do better each day. He didn’t talk about repenting from grievous sins, he was talking about the “little” things – learning and growing each day. That has always been the foundation of my testimony of the atonement – it is the power by which we progress each day. When I get impatient with my children, it is the atonement that allows me to try again the next day (or the next minute!) and erases all the mistakes I make as I learn how to be a mother.

That’s a pretty comforting knowledge – that my mistakes are not lasting. If I partake of the atonement each day – even in each minute of each day – my mistakes can be washed away!

Having this “daily repentance” understanding of the atonement has probably been the foundation of my understanding of repentance.

The underlying principle in repentance is change. Elder Christofferson said, “Perhaps as much as praying for mercy, we should pray for time and opportunity to work and strive and overcome.” How often do we pray for forgiveness without praying for the strength and opportunity to change and do things differently?
The ability we have to repent comes from the plan of redemption. Elder LeGrand R. Curtis Jr said, “‘To redeem’ is to buy or to buy back…if we repent, we can be forgiven of our sins, the price having been paid by our Redeemer.” This redemption is provided, whether or not we partake of it. As President Packer said, “There is a Redeemer, a Mediator, who stands both willing and able to appease the demands of justice and extend mercy to those who are penitent.”

Ironically, the most beautiful part of the atonement to me is that there is nothing we can do to repay the Savior. Elder Curtis said, “[T]he plan of redemption calls for our best efforts to fully repent and do the will of God.”

His statement reminded me of a BYU Devotional by Brad Wilcox, in which Brother Wilcox compared the atonement to a parent paying for piano lessons for their child.

Christ’s arrangement with us is similar to a mom providing music lessons for her child. Mom pays the piano teacher. How many know what I am talking about? Because Mom pays the debt in full, she can turn to her child and ask for something. What is it? Practice! Does the child’s practice pay the piano teacher? No. Does the child’s practice repay Mom for paying the piano teacher? No. Practicing is how the child shows appreciation for Mom’s incredible gift. It is how he takes advantage of the amazing opportunity Mom is giving him to live his life at a higher level. Mom’s joy is found not in getting repaid but in seeing her gift used—seeing her child improve. And so she continues to call for practice, practice, practice.

Elder Curtis quoted the hymn Savior, Redeemer of My Soul and I loved the line “Never can I repay thee, Lord, But I can love thee.”

How true! I hope that I can do my best to love the Lord and to repent daily of my weaknesses, making them strengths through His infinite atonement.

How do you partake of the atonement? What are your feelings about the plan of redemption? Are you sometimes discouraged when you have to repent over and over again? Do you recognize the growth that you have made in your repentance journey? What is the meaning of the atonement and repentance for you personally?

Find more insight on this talk over at

Diapers and Divinity’s General Conference Book Club

with all the feeling of a tender parent

(1 Nephi 8:37)

Parenting is a sensitive topic, and because of the individuality of each child, there are different ways parenting has to be applied in different situations. A friend of mine often said that she didn’t really like parenting books, because she didn’t think anyone could really tell her how to raise her kids, because they were her kids, and they were unique. While I agree (somewhat) with this attitude – children are unique and indeed have unique needs – I believe that there are some universal principles that govern good parenting, and they happen to be gospel principles.

My very favorite institute teacher (someone you’ll hear me talk about a lot on this blog), Uncle Wally, talks about following Heavenly Father’s example for parenting in an article in the book, My Soul Delighteth in the Scriptures. He expounds on more gospel-related parenting skills in his book The Soft-Spoken Parent. The parenting skills and principles I have learned by listening to Brother Goddard’s advice and knowledge (and experiences) have really enriched my life as a parent.

Last night my husband and I watched the overview of a parenting program developed by Brigham Young University’s school of education. It is a program they have developed after years and years of research and study of families, children, and parenting. It’s called You Can Do This: an Approach to Raising Wonderful Children. I love that they don’t call it the approach to raising wonderful children. Obviously that leaves room for other approaches. However – I believe that this program is founded on gospel principles.

After watching the overview video, my husband and I decided that it would be a good idea for us to go through the program together. Then we had an idea. What if we could get some of our friends to participate with us, in a type of book-club? Then I had an idea – what if I could get some online friends to participate with us in a type of online book club?

I think that maybe we will wait to start until the beginning of the year, due to the holidays and the busy schedules that people will have, but I hope that this can be an enlightening experience for all of those who choose to participate, and that we can learn a lot from this program and from the parents who will participate with us.

Each week the assignment will be to read one of the “lessons” in the program, and then during the week try to implement those strategies in our families. When we get back together at the end of the week, we will discuss what went well for us, where we have room for improvement, how the principle worked in our family, and then move on to the next principle.

There are more than 50 lessons, but we will try to pare it down and maybe combine a few lessons to shorten the course. Or maybe we will do it in 3 month intervals, and repeat? If you have any ideas how to go through this program in a group setting, let me know. As I said, this will be a kind of “book club” feel – not us teaching you (we have so much to learn ourselves!)

If you would like to participate (either online or in person – in person would be in the Salt Lake Valley, since that is where we live) let me know. We will probably do the online participants in a Google+ hangout video conference.

You Can Do This - English from McKay School of Education on Vimeo.

I will post more information on the blog as we get this thing organized. In the meantime, I invite you to go check out the website, You Can Do This and watch the overview video, or I have embedded the video here on the blog. We will probably ask each couple to watch the overview video prior to the first meeting. It is about 26 minutes long, but well worth it. My husband and I really enjoyed watching it, and we are looking forward to working through this program with a group.

What parenting programs have you participated in that have been meaningful to you and have created a difference in your parenting skills? Would you be interested in participating in this program with us – whether in person or online?

Forget Not – You Matter to Him

(find the talk here – Forget Me Not)
(find the talk here – You Matter to Him)

In President Dieter F. Uchtdorf’s talk, You Matter to Him, he spoke of a great paradox of man: “compared to God, we are nothing; yet we are everything to God.” To me these have always been some of the most beautiful principles of His gospel – that He knows and loves even me – one little person in a sea of faces and people and lives. And He doesn’t just know who I am, He loves me and cares for me deeply. Deeply enough that He gave His only begotten Son for me!

(image credit: wonderferret)

When I went to EFY (Especially for Youth) as a teenager just finishing high school, during one class with our session director (who just happened to be Matthew Richardson – now a member of the General Sunday School Presidency who gave a talk in October General Conference), he put a rubber glove over his head, covering everything except his mouth and blew it up. He said, “This is one kind of pride – the puffed up kind.” President Uchtdorf talked about this as one of the ways that Satan “appeal[s] to the extremes of the paradox of man.”

Then, Bro Richardson deflated the rubber glove and said, “This is the other kind of pride – the ‘I’m not worth anything’ kind of pride.” President Uchtdorf described this by saying, “[The adversary] attempts to focus our sight on our own insignificance until we begin to doubt that we have much worth. He tells us that we are too small for anyone to take notice, that we are forgotten—especially by God.”

Bro Richardson concluded by saying that neither having the rubber glove puffed up, nor having it deflated was going to be good for us. The solution was to completely remove the rubber glove from our head.

“How much larger your life would be
if your self were smaller in it.”
                                 ~G. K. Chesterton

I think that quote by G. K. Chesterton sums it up quite perfectly. President Uchtdorf said, “What matter[s]to [Heavenly Father is] that [we are] doing the best [we can], that [our] heart [is] inclined toward Him, and that [we are] willing to help those around [us].”

In President Uchtdorf’s talk from the General Relief Society Broadcast gave us a few things that if we will remember, will help us avoid having a rubber glove on our head.

When I heard the things that President Uchtdorf spoke about in his Relief Society talk, I couldn’t help but think what a timely message it was. I have been noticing a general despair among women in the Church these days (and I have by no means been exempt) and it touched me deeply that a prophet of God would know exactly what we needed to hear, and say it so perfectly.

You can read the whole talk on your own, and I highly recommend you do, so I won’t worry about quoting everything – but I will share the parts that meant the most to me.

I loved that he started by saying, “God is fully aware that you and I are not perfect.” Which I took to mean that we can stop beating ourselves up for not being perfect – because God already knows it. And then President Uchtdorf followed up with, “God is also fully aware that the people you think are perfect are not.” How often have I looked at a family and thought they were “perfect”! The irony of comparing ourselves to others is that we almost always end up playing to one or the other of the extremes President Uchtdorf spoke about in his talk about the paradox of man – we are either comparing our weaknesses to the strengths of others (thus downplaying our own worth), or we are comparing our strengths to the weaknesses of others (thus convincing ourselves that we are somehow worth more). This reminds me again of that quote from the article on refinement I posted a while ago. Talking about ourselves and talking about others are both ways to be prideful. But talking about ideas, doctrine, books, etc are the things that will inspire us to be more like the Savior.

I feel this way a lot, “Dear sisters, many of you are endlessly compassionate and patient with the weaknesses of others. Please remember also to be compassionate and patient with yourself.”

I wrote about good and foolish sacrifices a few weeks ago when I got back from a Ragnar Relay. If you haven’t read that post, I would ask that you do. It was a really significant learning experience for me. But as a disclaimer, I want to add this bit from President Uchtdorf’s talk: “Every person and situation is different, and a good sacrifice in one instance might be a foolish sacrifice in another.” Although I can’t for the life of me figure out when running a race like that would be a good sacrifice, maybe someone can help me see.

I am usually pretty good at being happy now – I am rarely waiting for my “golden ticket” – in fact, I wouldn’t even know what my “golden ticket” is! I enjoy my life in the moment so much that I have to continuously remind myself not to “temper [my] goals.” I am usually striving for the righteous desires of my heart, but I think that in my complacency and happiness with my life how it is, I sometimes slow down when I could be stepping up the pace a little. I am working hard to find that balance between enjoying what I have now, and working toward something better. My husband is usually the one waiting for his golden ticket, but I am the one who is sometimes too content with one bar of chocolate that I don’t even worry about buying more chocolate in an attempt to get a golden ticket.

“My dear sisters, the gospel of Jesus Christ is not an obligation.” When President Uchtdorf mentioned this principle, I immediately thought of people who say things like “I can’t do that, I’m Mormon.” or “I have to serve a mission, because I’m a Mormon guy.” I am working on writing down a statement that describes “why [I] committed to making [the gospel] a foundational part of [my life]” I think that if I can come up with a good “why” statement, the gospel will “[cease] to become a burden and, instead, [become] a joy and a delight.” I would love to say that it is a joy and a delight, and that it is precious and sweet – but I know that it can become more precious to me, if I will really focus on the why.

In the Mormon Messages above, go straight to 1:24 and listen to what he says about serving a mission. That is what President Uchtdorf is talking about.

“No matter how dark your days may seem, no matter how insignificant you may feel, no matter how overshadowed you think you may be, your Heavenly Father has not forgotten you. In fact, He loves you with an infinite love.”

I wish everyone could really understand that quote – God loves you with an infinite love. He knows you! He made you! Of course He would love you. But it’s harder to really internalize than it sounds. I have had a strong testimony that the Lord loves me from the time I was very young. It has been a great blessing in my life, and it is something that my heart yearns to share with every person on this earth.

Do you know that the Lord loves you? Do you sometimes fall into one of the traps of the adversary in drawing us to the extremes of the paradox of man? How are you able to find a peaceful place where you understand both doctrines? In what ways do you try to be patient with yourself? How do you recognize foolish and good sacrifices? Are you happy with your life now? Why have you made the gospel such a fundamental part of your life? Do you know that Heavenly Father loves you?

Find more insight on this talk over at
Diapers and Divinity’s General Conference Book Club

My Yoke Is Easy

This morning I read Matthew chapters 11 and 12 and while I was reading them I was trying to answer this question, “What do I learn about the character of Christ from these chapters?”

To be honest, it was kind of a hard task this morning. The Savior did a lot of teaching in these two chapters, but a lot of it was hard words to the Pharisees and others who were hard of heart. But then when I read Matthew 11:8-30 I thought about our baptismal covenants, and the Savior’s promise to us, and how we can use His promise as an example of how to keep our baptismal covenants.

In Matthew the Lord promises us:

Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. 

In Mosiah in the Book of Mormon, we learn about our baptismal covenants:

and now as ye are desirous to come into the fold of God, and to be called his people and are willing to bear one another’s burdens, that they may be light; Yea, and are willing to mourn with those that mourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort…

Because we take Christ’s name upon us in baptism, we must learn to become like Him and do the things that He does.

Christ is “meek and lowly in heart” and bears our burdens. When we are baptized, we covenant to do the same for others – bear their burdens to make them feel light.

What does it mean to be meek and lowly in heart? A definition for “meek”  in the Merriam-Webster dictionary is “easily imposed on.” The Savior is easily imposed on – we don’t have to plead and argue with Him for Him to agree to take our burdens. He just does it when we come to Him and ask. And we barely even have to ask, because He already knows that we have a burden.

In our lives, there are always people around us with burdens to be born. There are those who mourn, and those who need comfort. We do not need to wait for them to plead with us to take their burdens – the Savior is easily imposed on for comfort, and we should be the same way.

Sometimes we may feel that we can only bear our own burdens, but I know that we can bring both our burdens, and the burdens of others which we bear for them, to the Lord, and He will lighten our load. In Elder Alonso’s talk from General Conference, he said, “When we serve our neighbor, we help those who are in need. In the process we may find solutions to our own difficulties.” So as we bear the burdens of others, often we can find that our burdens are lightened as well.

What things have you learned about the character of Christ from the scriptures? How do you keep your baptismal covenant to bear one another’s burdens? How do you feel your burdens being lightened by the Savior?

Friday Fragments

I am running the Las Vegas Ragnar Relay this weekend! (I am actually writing this post on Thursday, and our run start time is at 6:00am, so I am probably either already running, or getting ready to run my first leg! 7.3 miles downhill, whoa!) I am running with my mother-in-law and a bunch of her friends, and a friend of mine from our ward who we roped into it at the last minute because we ran out of substitutes and too many of our runners got injured in other races… bummer!

I attended a beautiful wedding last weekend of a dear childhood friend. We have  known each other since we were in primary, and in fact, our last primary teacher (our teacher when we were all turning 12 and going into Young Women’s) was at the wedding! It was so nice to see her. She made a profound impact on all of our lives. She was young and single and ended up getting engaged and married while she was our teacher. She only taught us for about 9 months, but I think that she was by far one of the most significant teachers in my life. I have had so many good teacher who have truly loved me and cared for me it is incredible! I am trying to learn to have more love for people, like these great teachers have shown me.

The wedding was beautiful, and they had a bishop marry them (my friend has been less active since college, and her new husband is not a member). It was a really nice ceremony, and the bishop did a great job. I am so happy for my friend and her new husband, and I am grateful that I was able to be there for that special time for her. She was a bridesmaid in my wedding, nearly six(!) years ago.

Because the wedding was in my home state (Arkansas) last weekend, I flew there (all by myself! No kids!) and stayed with my brother and sister-in-law one night, my dear cousin the next night, and then my mom and dad the last night I was there. It was a whirlwind trip, but I loved getting to see everyone. The first morning I was there up at my brother’s house I went for a run in the morning before I had to leave for the wedding. I got up, ate breakfast, laced up my running shoes and as I was doing it I felt strange. I didn’t figure out exactly what it was until I was running and thinking about things (I feel like I am close to Heavenly Father when I run – just me, my feet methodically striking the pavement, and this particular time, listening to General Conference talks). I felt like something was missing, and I realized that I didn’t have any responsibilities here, away from my home. I didn’t have children to tend, dishes to wash, or laundry to do – and instead of feeling liberating, it felt scary. I am a mother and wife, first and foremost – so how do I live if I am not living for my family? It was the first time that I realized how much I truly love being home, taking care of my children, my husband, and my home. I don’t like being away from home and away from my family. I thought I would like it. Love it, even. For months leading up to the wedding weekend I was sure that I was going to be so glad to spend a weekend away from it all – the screaming, the crying, the potty accidents, the dishes, the picky eaters. But instead I missed it. I missed having to arrange for someone to tend the kids while I ran. I missed having to wash the dishes and start a load of laundry before I could get out the door. I didn’t like being able to do whatever I wanted to do whenever I wanted to do it.

I wanted to be a mother – with everything that encompasses. And I missed it this past weekend. I am leaving again this weekend for that Ragnar Relay, and I realized that I don’t want to go away again! I want to stay home! I want to take care of my kids and my house and my family. 
I am making a Reverence Book for the kids for Church. This is just the “reverent child” page. The thought bubble is going to have a flip book of pictures of Jesus that my four-year-old picked out at the distribution center. I had searched and searched for a Quiet Book I could make for the kids that would help them participate in Sacrament meeting, rather than distract them from Sacrament meeting. When I finish the book (sometime next week, hopefully) I will post pictures of the finished book and a post about teaching children to worship in Sacrament meeting. I am really excited about this Reverence Book, even though it has been a lot of work (I had to make up the pattern myself…) 

If you won a picture from my giveaway and you are wondering where your print is, I promise I will send them. They are sitting on top of my desk with addresses attached, waiting to be mailed. I have been so busy going out of town and such, and it’s been kind of a rough month, so I will probably mail them out the first of November. No promises, though. I will try my best to get them to you by Christmas. Ha ha.

Meet some other crazy folk over at Heather’s Friday Five linkup.