Study and Teach the Gospel - A Missionary/Parent Connection

While my son, Ryan, is on his mission, I decided to study Preach My Gospel to help me connect with him and what he is learning and teaching. The last few weeks I have been focusing on the introduction in Chapter 3, the focus is on studying and teaching the gospel of Jesus Christ. As I was studying this lesson, I felt impressed to think about these principles in Preach My Gospel in terms of my role as a mother with respect to my children. As I study the gospel, the Spirit will guide my words and actions as I teach my children. I always struggle to know what best to say or do when it comes to teaching my children about the gospel. I don’t want them to feel like my love or acceptance of them is in any way dependent on their acceptance of the gospel - but at the same time, I want to make sure they understand, in no uncertain terms, that I have a testimony of the restored gospel of Jesus Christ. And I want them to know that I believe living the gospel will bring them happiness, even if they don’t believe that. 

On the Subject of Extending Invitations 

I believe in the power of extending invitations. I know that when people are invited, they feel included. But also, I worry that extending invitations to my children may make them feel like I am trying to coerce or manipulate them. The only thing I want them to feel in an invitation is my love for them. 

On the Subject of Individual 

Needs The counsel in Preach My Gospel is to prepare lessons based on the individual needs of the people you are teaching. I believe this principle holds for parenting as well. When I think of my children, I think of the very unique personalities, experience, and needs each of them have. I want to ensure that I am preparing myself to teach and guide them in their very unique circumstances, and as the individual child of God they are. These questions from the Preach My Gospel manual were very helpful, and I am going to restate them for myself as a parent: 

• What invitation will I extend to help my child build faith in Christ and make progress? Consider my child’s progress, situation, and needs. 
• What doctrine and principles will help my child keep the commitment I have invited them to make? I think it is important for me to understand the doctrine and principles associated with the invitations I am extending to my children. Before extending the invitations, I need to be sure that I understand what I am asking them to do. 
• How will I help my child learn the doctrine? In order to teach the doctrine, I have to know the doctrine, and then make a plan for how to teach it to them. Will it be in a sit down lesson? Can this just be a conversation as I walk? I should plan the questions I will ask them, like I planned a lesson when I was a teacher. And as always, seek the Spirit to guide and help me. 
• What blessings has God promised for accepting and keeping commitments? More of the things that I have to know before I can teach my children. Being able to testify to my children seems like it will be important, and knowing the blessings associated with the invitations will help me be able to testify to them. 
• Which family members or friends can help teach and support my children? I feel like I can be more explicit in this by directly recruiting friends and family members to support my children. I think that I do this generally, but I maybe am not specific enough about the help and support my child may need. 
• What can I do to help my children keep their commitments after they leave home? This is a hard one, but following up with daily contact can help, like is recommended to missionaries. Letting them vent or tell me how things are going and what their struggles are can help them feel heard and maybe that will help them make the commitments? 
• How can I better help my children next time? Evaluating myself as a mother is not something I have a hard time with, but I think making that reflection a little more targeted could be helpful. Is my child’s faith in Jesus Christ growing? 

Thinking about missionary work through a parenting lens is helpful, and it also shows how valuable missionary service is for young adults preparing for parenting. Missionaries teach and invite, but at the end of the day, their friends must make a choice for themselves. Similarly, parents teach and invite, but at the end of the day, our children must make choices for themselves. I imagine that it can be hard to watch those you teach reject the gospel while you are serving a mission. But that can prepare you for the experiences that you may have as a parent, watching your children reject the gospel and the covenant path. 

 Teaching By the Spirit 

I have always been taught that the Spirit is the true teacher. It is my job as a mother to create the environment and impart the knowledge for gospel learning, but at the end of the day it is up to my children to choose what they will decide to follow. 

 The Preach My Gospel guide talks about memorization and how it is not necessary to memorize the lessons to teach them, but that there is a benefit in memorizing scriptures. I have always enjoyed having scriptures memorized. I think that memorizing scriptures can help Heavenly Father give us revelation, by directing our minds to scriptures that we have read. 

 Individual Needs 

“Which lesson you teach, when you teach it, and how much time you give to it are best determined by the needs of the person you are teaching and the guidance of the Spirit.” I have a cornucopia of children. Each child is incredibly unique, with their own experience, perspectives, needs, and challenges. As I have tried to stay close to Heavenly Father and let Him guide me in my parenting, I have been able to teach my children based on their individual needs. “The right invitation at the right time can prompt people to do things that will build their faith.” I think this is the thing I try to focus on the most. I don’t always get it right - I am sure I miss things that God would have me do, but any time I am prompted to share something with my children or reach out to them, I try to do so. 

 What are We Supposed to teach? 

• According to Mosiah 18:18-20, “teach them concerning the things pertaining to the kingdom of God… nothing save it were repentance and faith on the Lord, who had redeemed his people.” 
• “sanctify yourselves and ye shall be endowed with power” - Heavenly Father will give us the power to teach our children as we seek to become sanctified. I want to study more about how become stanctified. 

On studying the doctrine 

As we study the doctrine of Jesus Christ we can become more understanding of our own divine identity (1 Nephi 15:14). As we come to a knowledge of our Redeemer and His doctrine, we can learn “how to come unto Him and be saved.” The sons of Mosiah and Alma the younger sanctified themselves to become better equipped to preach the gospel. Because they studied the scriptures “diligently” and fasted and prayed, they “had the spirit of prophecy, and the spirit of revelation, and when they taught, they taught with power and authority of God.” I want this - I want to be able to teach with the power and authority of God. So I will study the scriptures diligently and fast and pray, and then share God’s doctrine with my children.

Mission Prep

(I wrote this back in December - forgot to hit "publish" until April)

My second son is preparing to leave on his mission in a few weeks. He starts at-home MTC in a week, and then he will enter the Provo MTC and then be on his way to the Kentucky Louisville mission. I am incredibly proud of him and please with his decision to serve a mission. I know that he will grow a ton from the experience.

As he has been preparing for his mission, I have been studying Preach My Gospel. I wish I could say I have been studying with him, but he is pretty hard to get ahold of.

In any case, I have been enjoying studying Preach My Gospel. I was studying Chapter 2 yesterday and came across the inspiration verse for my blog:

15 And upon these I write the things of my soul, and many of the scriptures which are engraven upon the plates of brass. For my soul delighteth in the scriptures, and my heart pondereth them, and writeth them for the learning and the profit of my children.

16 Behold, my soul delighteth in the things of the Lord; and my heart pondereth continually upon the things which I have seen and heard.

The part of the verse that I have focused on is "for the learning and the profit of my children". I want my children to know that my soul delighteth in the scriptures, and I hope that they will find delight in the scriptures themselves.

Nothing, and Yet Everything

In Mosiah Chapter 4, King Benjamin has just finished speaking to his people when they "viewed themselves in their own carnal state, even less than the dust of the earth." After they had learned about the atonement of Jesus Christ, an overwhelming feeling of worthlessness filled the people's hearts. King Benjamin responded to them by encouraging their sense of their nothingness.

Hundreds of years before this, Moses had a similar experience. In Moses 1 he says, "I know that man is nothing, which thing I never had supposed." The irony of this statement is that Moses had just been in the presence of God, who had proclaimed to him, "behold, thou art my son... I have a work for thee, Moses, my son; and thou art in the similitude of mine Only Begotten". How did Moses' thought process go from "You are my son" to "I am nothing"? How did the King Benjamin's people go from learning of the atonement of Jesus Christ to feeling as if they 

It is as if learning of the beauty of the Love of God (which is the atonement of Jesus Christ - see 1 Nephi 11) stirs in man's heart an awareness of their nothingness and insignificance in the eternal plan - or rather, that the glorious truth that "the worth of a soul is great in the sight of God" stirs that very soul to the greatest depths of humility.

There is so much beauty in opposition, in contrast, and in juxtaposition. Indeed, the gospel requires a complement of seemingly opposing truths - justice and mercy, nothingness and infinite worth, dark and light. Jacob's discourse in 2 Nephi 2 eloquently describes this necessary opposition.

For it must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things. If not so... righteousness could not be brought to pass, neither wickedness, neither holiness nor misery, neither good nor bad. Wherefore, all things must needs be a compound in one; wherefore, if it should be one body it must needs remain as dead, having no life neither death, nor corruption nor incorruption, happiness nor misery, neither sense nor insensibility.

In King Benjamin's discourse, he goes on to testify to the people that their feelings of nothingness were the key to salvation - but not just those feelings on their own. He testified that a person also needs a knowledge of the goodness of God, and also the atonement, and needs to put his trust in the Lord. Then "this is the man who receiveth salvation, through the atonement which was prepared form the foundation of the world for all mankind... and this is the means whereby salvation cometh."

What a beautiful illustration of the "compound in one" spoken of by Jacob in the Book of Mormon. We are everything to God, indeed, we are His children and the very reason for the existence of the atonement. And yet, we are less than the dust of the earth - we are so small and insignificant, which makes the magnitude of the atonement even more glorious.

Oh it is wonderful, that He would care for me enough to die for me. Oh it is wonderful, wonderful to me.

What do you think about the contrast between the humility of feeling the nothingness of man compared to the glory of the atonement, which is everything for us? Are there other places where you have experienced the "compound in one"? 

 

 

Come Follow Me January 9-15 Matthew 2; Luke 2 Part 1

I need a way to really dig into Come Follow Me. I used to blog when I studied the scriptures, and when blogging kind of fell out of favor (because now we have all this video/audio content) I kind of stopped blogging regularly. There was also the complication of the tragic end of my marriage, my remarriage to a man who gave me three extra kiddos, and then raising all those kids. Ha ha. Well, things have slowed down, and now I am going to really get back to blogging.

From the day of his birth, it was clear that Jesus was no ordinary child. It wasn't just the new star in the heavens of the joyous angelic proclamation that made Jesus' infancy remarkable. It was also the fact that such a variety of faithful people - from different nations, professions, and backgrounds - felt immediately drawn to Him.

Isn't this so remarkable? That so many people from so many different backgrounds came unto Him. Will I be drawn to Christ when He comes again? Am I drawn to Him now?  

The Nativity story is such a familiar story, sometimes it looses its wonder. I am trying to remember to never lose my sense of wonder, as the song goes. I want to find wonder in all the familiarity of the world. 

Luke 2:1-7

Jesus Christ was born in humble circumstances.

What is the significance of the Savior being born in humble circumstances? The scriptures talk about how the Savior knew exactly how to succor us, because of his experiences. We tend to have more empathy for people when we have similar experiences as them. Beyond just the idea of empathy and succoring, the prophets of old prophesied that the Savior would be born in the circumstances in which He was born.

The Come Follow Me manual suggests "ponder what [the Luke 2:1-7] account of His birth teaches you about Him. Try to identify details or insights in this story that you hadn't noticed before." Here goes:

• It had been prophesied that the Savior would be born in Bethlehem. The census happened at just the right time for Joseph to be able to take Mary to Bethlehem. Heavenly Father allow things to happen at just the right time, in just the right order for the Savior to be born in Bethlehem.
• I often think about how Joseph and Mary decided that Mary should go to Bethlehem. I doubt Joseph was required to take Mary. He probably could have left her home to have the baby, but instead, they both went. I imagine that Mary and Joseph were not ignorant of the prophecies of the Savior's birth. When the decree went out to be taxed, they were likely not surprised that they would be going to Bethlehem so near to Mary's delivery. Maybe they had a little conversation and said "Look, God said that Jesus would be born in Bethlehem. Let's pack the donkey and get ready to have this baby in Bethlehem." In fact, I doubt that the birth in Bethlehem was unexpected. They probably knew it would happen, and likely carried provisions for the birth, and possibly event traveled with midwives or other birth attendants.

How does noticing these things affect your feelings toward Him?

It is comforting to know that He knew. That He knew he would be coming to a lowly, humble stable. He knew, and He wanted to do it. He was willing to do it to fulfill the prophesies, and to better understand how to succor his people.

Stay tuned for Part 2 (and probably Part 3, etc) of my Come Follow Me study this week!

I Will Walk with Jesus - harmony part and C instrument obbligato

 I wrote this for my family to sing/play for our Primary program in November. We have a tiny Primary, so our ward typically has families participate in the Primary program. Feel free to use this arrangement. I only ask that you do not sell it.

To listen, CLICK HERE.

For the score and parts CLICK HERE.

Please leave a comment and let me know how you liked it, or if you have any feedback!

The Lost Women of the Old Testament (June 13-19)

 The title is a little tongue-in-cheek. The women are there. Just not in the Come Follow Me curriculum. But that's okay! Because it isn't the end-all-be-all of gospel study. It is meant to be a unifying curriculum, which is awesome, but sometimes we need a little more. So here we go.

Tonight I am going to be studying:

• Phinehas's Wife
• Michal

Phinehas's Wife

When I skimmed the scriptures at the beginning of Heather's chapter on his particular woman, I knew I had zero context for the story, so I headed over to 1 Samuel 4 to figure out what was going on when this woman was mentioned. Turns out the Israelites were at war with the Philistines, and the Philistines won and captured the ark of the covenant (you know, that super important sacred symbol from the tabernacle that represents the throne of God? Yeah, the same one). Eli (the priest who raised Samuel the boy prophet) and his sons die (in fulfillment of a prophecy from a few chapters previous), and then Phinehas's wife dies in childbirth. (Phinehas is one of the sons of Eli). This is a pretty tragic story, but we can learn a lot from it.

When Phinehas's wife dies in childbirth, she names her son "Ichabod" or "Where is the glory?" because she is so weighed down by the grief of her husband's and father-in-law's deaths, and the capture of the ark of the covenant. This was a really rocky time for the Israelites, and I can imagine birthing a child during this madness was probably a little overwhelming. Heather points out that not too far in the future, if Phinehas's wife hadn't died in childbirth, she would have seen the great prophet Samuel, King David, King Solomon, and the beautiful temple being built.

Heather points out "We can trust that when the Lord begins a 'birthing' in our life, when we feel the pangs of travail in our minds, our souls, and our bodies, that there will also one day be a deliverance - a day when our pain will cease, our souls will rejoice, and we will hold new life in our arms." I recently bore my testimony about this concept. I have been through some really dark times in the past several years. The scripture that has kept me going has been Psalms 30:5 "Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning."  I know that is true - even if the joy doesn't come in this life, it will come. Because of the atonement of Jesus Christ joy will always come. His sacrifice swallows up all suffering and pain. He is the true Comforter.

President Spencer W. Kimball wisely taught, "If we were to close the doors upon sorrow and distress, we might be excluding our greatest friends and benefactors." There has to be opposition in this life. It is what we chose in the pre-existence. We knew there would be pain. I don't know that we fully understood what that meant, but we chose it. We wanted to be like our Father and Mother in heaven and we knew that we would have to endure suffering to obtain that.

Michal

This is a fascinating story that I honestly had never heard before. Michal was the first wife of David, before he was king. It sounds like she was young and probably pretty smitten with David, and even helped him escape from her father, Saul, who wanted to kill him (David). However, once David escaped it appears that he disappeared and never really came back for Michal. So Saul married Michal to another man, and it appears that she lived happily with her second husband. But then David came back as the king, and ordered Michal to come back to be his wife.

Thinking about what that might feel like gives me all sorts of feelings. To think your husband was dead, or had abandoned you, then find happiness with another marriage, and then have that husband come back as a king and order you to move in with him again. I would feel pretty used and abused. It sounds like they didn't have a good relationship when she came to live with him as his queen. I can't really blame her. What a rough situation!

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I wanted to study a few more women tonight, but it's getting late, so I'll probably study them this weekend (Abigail and Ahinoam of Jezreel).

Come Follow Me and Women

 Some friends and started the year getting together and discussing the women in the Old Testament as we followed the Come Follow Me curriculum each week. Things got busy for some of us (me) and the group kind of dissolved, but we are trying to resurrect it. They got together tonight, but unfortunately I wasn't able to make it because I am getting ready to leave for Girls Camp tomorrow and all my clothes are in the wash. A silly excuse, I know, but to make up for it, while the laundry was running, I went through Heather's book Walking with the Women in the Old Testament and tried to correlate all the women in her book with the Come Follow Me curriculum. I was surprised to find that the majority of the scriptures that mention women in the Old Testament have been completed left out of the Come Follow Me curriculum. As I skimmed over those chapters, though, it was pretty clear why. Many of the verses don't mention much about the women, and almost all of the stories are pretty tragic, or deal with some seriously heavy topics (incest, dying in childbirth, etc). Not exactly stuff you want to bring up in Sunday School.

But for us women, I think talking about these circumstances and the women who endured them is incredibly valuable, so I made a schedule so we can study them. Some of them I was able to match up with the Come Follow Me curriculum, but the majority are in books that we have already covered at this point in Come Follow Me, so we'll have to play catch up later.

Because I am not with my friends, I decided I would type out my thoughts about the women that fit with Come Follow Me this week. But I think I'll do it in another post, so look for that one to show up tomorrow (if anyone is even still reading this blog - ha ha ha. I highly doubt it. Although I do plan to write more on here. I've forgotten how much I love writing. Maybe some day I will write a book.

Let Us Oft Speak Kind Words to Each Other

 Today I had my family write an essay about the hymn, Let Us Oft Speak Kind Words. They said I had to do the essay as well.

I sat with my 7 year old and talked through the meaning of the lyrics with him. I have always loved this hymn, but the words area so beautiful and I was reminded of that today.

This hymn really describes how words can be magic - literal magic. Kind words can give courage and hope, and bring happiness. On the other hand, disparaging words and harsh tones can stir up anger and hate, as we have seen all too much in our society. True followers of Christ will desire to use kind words that can soften hearts and awake souls to good cheer! In Proverbs 15:1 we read, "A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger." 

I love the imagery in this hymn, and I used that with my 7 year old. We closed our eyes and imagined the "warblings of birds on the heather" and felt the happiness and cheer when we heard those little birds. We closed our eyes and imagined the "sunbeams of morn on the mountains" and felt the warmth of the morning rays of sun and the beauty of the mountains. We closed our eyes and listened to the "murmur of cool, pleasant fountains" as the water fell, and felt peace in our hearts and minds. If we can evoke those kinds of feelings with something as simple as kind words, why wouldn't we always speak kind words?

Further, kind words last much longer than the moment they are uttered. Because those kind words produce such rich and powerful emotions, "the kind words we give shall in memory live and sunshine forever impart." Those we share kind words with will remember those kind words forever, and maybe years later, when we aren't around, they will need encouragement, peace, and cheer, and they might hear the kind words we spoke in those moments, bringing them the sunshine anew from the time we spoke those kind words. 

Sometimes it can be difficult to use kind words. We may be impatient, tired, hungry, stressed, any number of negative things can be going on in our own lives. It is in these difficult moments that we must take a step back - even put ourselves in timeout (I put myself in timeout quite frequently) and ask our Father in Heaven to soften our hearts. I am not as good as I should be about stopping myself before I use grievous words, but I am making a commitment today to use kinder words. I want the words that last in my children's minds and hearts to be the kind ones I speak. Sometimes when I am impatient or stressed I am harsh. Sometimes when my children are stubborn and/or disrespectful, the angry words bubble out. When I am anxious or worried, I also have a hard time with kind words. 

I believe in the power of prayer, and so today and for the rest of the week I am going to make a commitment to pray for kind words - that I will find kind ways to speak to my family members, my children, my spouse.