To Rebecca - Writing Journal -
I've learned if you want to be a writer, you need to write everyday or at least every other day.
When I was a child I dreamed of being a writer. I wrote short stories, children's books, and poetry almost obsessively since I was about 6 or 7. I still remember writing my first "real" story on Word Perfect '95 on an old IBM computer with a blue screen and F keys. Before that I would write stories on our Macintosh that had a program that would read aloud what you had written in this horrible computerized man's voice.
I have since grown out of writing stories (mostly). Although up until probably college I would write the first 15-20 pages of countless stories. Some of them were pretty good. I would also write by hand in my notebooks at school. In high school I continued to write poetry and was even published in my high school's literary magazine, which I helped edit. It wasn't anything amazing, but I really enjoyed creative writing.
Now I mostly write for my blog, and in my journal. I'm not a great writer - I think I just have a lot to say (if you know me in person you know that I will talk your ear off, given the chance). But I believe in writing.
At this point I have begun to ramble, and honestly I am not entirely sure why I starting writing this post in the first place.
I guess to just share with you my love of writing. For some reason I feel uninhibited when I write. I don't feel like I have to put up a facade or pretend I am not really who I am. I don't have to worry (too much) about tact or political correctness. I can just open up and share my thoughts. It's like ultimate access to the real me.
Honestly, that is probably the reason why I don't tell people who actually know me (i.e., my ward, my friends, my family) about my blog. In person I am able to gauge the response I get from others and mold and shift what I say and how I say it, and carefully choose the topics of conversation, so that no one feels threatened, so that no one feels uncomfortable. Unfortunately, that can also end up being kind of boring.
This ended up being a lot more personal than I intended, but I think it feels good to get it out there.
Here is a picture of my four journals:
The red and black journal spans from my first entry in December 1997 (when I received the journal) to June 2004 shortly after my graduation from high school.
The blue fairy/ballerina bunny journal was the next one I wrote in - I received it from a close friend for our high school graduation. I am still not sure why I used it... It was really not my style, as you can tell. I probably used it because I love that particular friend. That one spans from June 2004 to July 1, 2005. The black spiral journal is July 2005 to March 2010 and represents the fullest period of my life so far - that one contains my courtship, engagement, wedding, two pregnancies and births, and about 6 moves. It includes my husband joining the military, months and months of separation due to military training, and a lot of stress and anxiety. In fact, I think the 5 years in that journal were probably some of the most anxious years of my life.
The fat black leather journal on the far right is my current journal. From March 2010 until today, July 2012, and I am about half way through (the pages are pretty thick - probably 4 times as thick as the red and black journal).
My current journal is a journal of healing, a record of finding peace, understanding the refiner's fire, and growing so fast it hurt. I am hoping that the next several years can fill this journal with more peace, with joy, love, and strength.
I am going to start the 365 day challenge over again today. I was much more sane when I was writing every day. I dare you to join me!
Do you keep a journal? How often do you write? When did you start keeping a journal?
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